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Unread 01-14-2015, 11:08 AM   #1
SassyRas
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Default The new gal

Hello!
I am new to this all, bare with me...

Today is day 14 & I am feeling really good!
I am sleeping better & my head is clear.. Digestion is back to normal & my liver doesn't hurt.

I am making 2015 all about me & my health
It kinda spooks me how easy this has been so far, I have been a daily drinker for about 25 years.
I own a business & I work a lot of hours, but i managed to drink after work at home... No going out after work & drinking and driving... Just go to work & come home and drink a cpl of bottles of wine...but it was taking it's toll on my head & body.
I am thinking I will need to surround myself with others who have gone through the same to keep my head in the right direction, so here I am.
I look forward to getting to know ya all better & I look forward to staying sober & getting healthy..
Thanks for your time
Sassyras
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Unread 01-14-2015, 11:55 AM   #2
Tryntryagain
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Hello Sassy Ras, bright blessings to you.

What a lovely introduction. I can tell you that your journey into sustained sobriety is there for the taking.

Alcohol has no favoured victims, it will take anyone, from the top to the bottom, and everywhere inbetween. When we have a problem that needs addressing to save our lives, we come together and support each other on that journey.

You are well on your way. So lovely to have you on board.

Be peaceful, be thoughtful and be strong. Loveness to you Sassy Ras.
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Unread 01-14-2015, 01:04 PM   #3
jenm
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Hi Sassyras - welcome!

First congrats on 14 days. That is a big deal! I can really relate to the "isolated" drinking stuff. Almost like I told myself "It's ok. I'm not driving....I'm not really hurting anyone..." But really, I was. I was inadvertently hurting every relationship in which I was involved whether it be with others at work, friends, or my own family. I was so good at living the double life, or so I thought. I would be so good at what I did professionally and boy did I have them fooled! The problem was that no matter where I went, there I was. If that makes any sense, I completely lost myself. Nothing really mattered to me as my life and my brain had changed so much from my daily routine of drinking.

I am so grateful you are here. I cannot do this alone. It is a good reminder to me because I cannot forget where I come from as I do not want to go back there.

In my experience, stopping drinking IS easy. It is staying stopped that takes some work. Whether or not I'm drinking, life still continues to happen and there will come a time when there is a choice to be made, to drink or to stay sober. Think through that first drink. It is the first drink that will pull you right back there. There must be some reason that you decided to stop, think about how you felt at that moment.

We are here for you! Glad you're here! Take care, Jenm
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Unread 01-14-2015, 01:32 PM   #4
SassyRas
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Thumbs up

Ty Jen & tryntry,
The first day when I quit, I stayed in my jammies & watched A&E's intervention marathon...so when I say I am surprised how easy it has been so far, I figured I would feel sicker...I just felt uncomfortable the first day while I lay around watching tv... My internal thermometer was going up & down, clammy & sweats...but nothing too bad...slept kinda crappy the first night which is always a pain, when I work 10 hour days I need my sleep.

I know the hard part will be staying sober, but the fact I am feeling so much better is huge...talk about instant gratification !!

I come from a family where my dad was an alcoholic ( he's been sober many years, 30 I think) My brother is a functioning alcoholic also..

I look forward to getting to know all of you, & maybe someday I can be of help to you all as well

Sassyras
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Unread 01-14-2015, 01:33 PM   #5
R. Lee
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Sassyras, Welcome to this site. Congratulations on 14 days without drinking.

Stopping drinking is not easy to do but I do it in a simple manner. I take it 1 day at a time so I do not get discouraged with trying to stay sober for the rest of my life, something I could never do & failing before caused me to give up trying to stop drinking for 20 years. We also encourage people here to think through that 1st. drink. It is not the 30th drink that will get us but it will be the 1st drink that starts our drinking all over again.

Thank you for coming in here & sharing that you have a problem with your drinking. You are admitting you have a problem & that is so very important, So many come in look around knowing they have a problem but do not have the courage to speak up & ask for help.

Keep coming back & let us know how you are doing. Also help others here who are struggling by supporting them. Doing that helps us get out of ourselves.
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Unread 01-14-2015, 01:44 PM   #6
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Sassyras,

Welcome and congrats on 14 days sober!!!

Your story sounds similar to mine. Eventually I was sick and tired of being sick and tired and fortunately found my way here. For that I will be eternally grateful.

Learn about addiction, learn about yourself, and be kind to yourself during this process of sobriety. Sobriety is a journey taken steps at a time. It is work, hard work but easier as time goes on. Remember H.A.L.T. : Hungry, Angry, Lonely, Tired. They can be triggers to drink. Find ways to stay active, occupy your time and your mind during those moments of the day when you are most likely to drink. Have a plan in place, a person to contact to help you through the tough spots. Urges to drink will come and they will seem to come seemingly out of nowhere. It is OK. It is Normal and the intensity and frequency will diminish over time. The important thing. Don't drink : )

Keep posting and stay the course.

Regards,
Saint
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Unread 01-14-2015, 01:53 PM   #7
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Welcome SassyRas, we are glad your here and I know you are glad to be sober. You can do it, one day at a time, Much support to you!
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Unread 01-14-2015, 03:00 PM   #8
Nicole0909
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Keep your head up and stay focused you can anything if you put your mind to it good job God bless
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Unread 01-14-2015, 04:20 PM   #9
SassyRas
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Thank you for the warm welcome Nicole , lost dog, saint & R. lee.
Means a lot to me for you to take the time to welcome a stranger .

For the most part I feel very good. There are moments that pass me through the day when I think a beer would be wonderful or a glass of wine & then I remind myself why I am doing this & then it goes away.

Do you folks think it easier to quit when you hit *bottom*?
I have come nowhere near hitting bottom... I never miss a day of work, never miss paying a bill, no driving issues, relationships are fine...I just made my mind up to quit & I wonder if that actually makes it harder to quit..or should I say harder to stay quit..just tossing that out there

Sassyras
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Unread 01-14-2015, 05:33 PM   #10
gmasusie
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Sassyras,

Everyone is different. I was one of the lucky ones who had very little trouble with withdrawal. However, I had to go to a support group face to face to quit, even after lurking around here for about a year, going to doctor, therapy, etc. They had me make a list of the ways my life had become unmanagable because of alcohol. I look at that list every morning and I check this website a couple of times a day.

You do not realize it, but you are already helping those of us who are here. As those with experience and wisdom (Jenm, RLee, Saint, etc....) have said, being reminded of where we came from helps us stay sober. Welcome! Tell us more of your story.

This is the place and the group that keeps me sober.

Susie
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Unread 01-14-2015, 05:35 PM   #11
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Hey Sassyras!

Everyone is different, and I believe that anyone's stopping point (some may call it a 'bottom') is different. I think everyone who abuses alcohol or drugs comes to a point when they realize that the addiction or abuse has become bigger than he/she imagined. I know a lot of people over the years who did not have some of the consequences that people often associate with addiction.

For example, many years ago before I learned anything about addiction, I thought that someone who was an alcoholic was a homeless type person who drank out of their bottle which was wrapped in a brown paper sack. Silly, I know. Surely it couldn't be ME! I was a teacher, educating our youth, a fitness instructor who rocked out in classes, a loving mother of her sons, my bills were paid, everything looked good on the outside! However, I was dying on the inside. Dying! Oh I am so grateful I don't have to live like that anymore.

Our society is full of finger pointing and labelers. I don't know if "labelers" is a word but I'm using it. Things are everyone else's fault, there's something wrong with that person, etc. I cannot tell anyone that he or she is an alcoholic. I can only speak for myself. In my experience, I have noticed that people who think they may have a problem with alcohol usually do. Anyway, just my 2 cents. I think you're doing great! Don't overanalyze it - you are sober today and I am too, and I am so grateful for that! Jenm
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Unread 01-14-2015, 06:13 PM   #12
SassyRas
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Ty Jen & gmasusie,
I am here to learn how to stay sober, whatever that entails... I am guessing I would not have bothered to get sober, but my health is telling me I need to...
I enjoyed wine and beer after work too much to say goodbye...
But I have people depending on me to be around for a few more years...I have no children, but I have 2 dogs who depend on me & I have a significant other who depends on me also, as well as my customers.

Sassyras
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Unread 01-14-2015, 07:15 PM   #13
gmasusie
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Good for you! Keep reminding yourself of all the reasons you have to live and all the ways alcohol interferes with your life. Jenm's brother had a liver transplant; I had a double bypass. Many others on this site have health problems you can avoid.

Susie
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Unread 01-14-2015, 07:19 PM   #14
SecretTiger
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Welcome!

I'm new here myself and already this great community has given me a huge amount of strength and advice. Two weeks is huge, well done!

Jen, I totally agree about the 'labelers'. There was a time when I told myself I couldn't possibly be an alcoholic because I only drank beer and wine, or I didn't drink in the morning. Alcoholics, we're told, drink spirits all day long and aren't professionals holding down responsible jobs. How wrong that is.

Not so long ago my brother, who also has a drinking problem, told me about one of his friends who had died because of alcohol poisoning, but he qualified it with "but he'd started drinking vodka." We're not okay if we stay away from certain types of alcohol, we need to stay away from alcohol period.
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Unread 01-14-2015, 10:02 PM   #15
gmasusie
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Great observation! Each of us, deep down, knows if alcohol is a problem for us. If it is, why continue to drink?
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Unread 01-15-2015, 07:23 AM   #16
SassyRas
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Day 15 ... wooowoooo made it past the 2 week mark...(hey, whatever I can get excited about I will)
So I have been allowing myself to eat chocolate & whatever else I feel like....I usually never indulge in sweets & extras... but being so strict right now seems silly.
I am still sleeping pretty sound, altho I am waking earlier... at least I am getting sound sleep when I sleep...( I have an insomnia problem which I just live with... but it is better)
I have been incorporating vitamins in my diet & drinking lot's of water to flush myself... Thinking of joining a gym this next week... gonna start out with swimming... Might be a good thing to do after work which is the bewitching hours... Well, ty all for letting me journal, rant, pat myself on the back & ty for your input... it helps a lot & means a lot to know I am not alone right now..

Much love & have a wonderful day
Sassyras
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Unread 01-15-2015, 09:43 AM   #17
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SassyRas, Congratulations on 15 days without a drink. Yes alcoholics that are recovering seem to eat sweets. Keep in up.
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Unread 01-15-2015, 10:43 AM   #18
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That's a real good conversational theme to consider, since some alcoholics never will quit. I will read on to see who else posts. for me I knew. I got embarrassed too much on very rare binges.
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Unread 01-16-2015, 07:28 AM   #19
SassyRas
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Day 16 & I am feeling good
I am not gonna drink today

Breaking out in song: I feeeeel gooood, I knew that I would dododododododo


Have a great day all

Sassyras
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Unread 01-16-2015, 11:01 AM   #20
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Good going SassyRas. Keep it up. It is that simple.
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Unread 01-16-2015, 11:53 AM   #21
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SassyRas...congrats...keep it going...

have a great day
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Unread 01-16-2015, 06:42 PM   #22
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Right on....
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Unread 01-16-2015, 08:23 PM   #23
SassyRas
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Thanks for the encouragement… The weekend is approaching & the weekend is the hard days for me.

I will have to find amusements to keep myself occupied this weekend, for some reason I think this weekend might be a tough one…Gonna stay positive tho & forge ahead…I will keep you all posted as to how it goes!

Ty, again & have a great weekend!

Sassyras
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Unread 01-16-2015, 08:34 PM   #24
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You can do it, I'm sure of that! I hope you have a great weekend.
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Unread 01-16-2015, 11:44 PM   #25
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I found going to a meeting on the weekend helped me. Are there any in your area?

Susie
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Unread 01-17-2015, 11:28 AM   #26
R. Lee
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Susie. Good going with the meetings. They help me too.
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Unread 01-17-2015, 03:32 PM   #27
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Hi SassyRas,

Weekends used to be hard, but they get better, what I did was, I threw away all the drinks, well not just in the trash, but I emptied then in the sink...so you don't give that wicked mind of yours a second chance...then stay away from friends for at least two weekends in a row, order or make good food ahead of time, as you feel the crave time is approaching...eat food, watch TV - a good movie and drink water or pop if possible lots of it. Keep yourself full...the cravings will go away and make sure you go to bed soon after movie gets over (try to start playing movie little late)..

my 2 cents but these are just tips, everyone is different so something else might work for others..this worked for me...

Have a great day and weekend...
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Unread 01-18-2015, 07:44 AM   #28
SassyRas
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Day 18

TY, Iam, Secret, Lee & Susie,

I got through Saturday just fine, I am eating too much & that has to stop soon. I figure I am saving around 800-1000 calories by not drinking beer or wine so I have been giving myself a break… but I don't need to replace a bad habit with another bad habit.

Today is Sunday & used to be my fun day … brunch and a bloodymary & keep on going…Gonna find something to do today…

Hey Secret congrats on the 6 days!!! Woot woot!

I will let ya know how the day goes…
Everyone have a peaceful happy day!!!

Sassyras
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Unread 01-18-2015, 09:00 AM   #29
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Good afternoon Sassyras. Bright blessings to you.

I must say you are doing extremely well....well done!

I found that when i stopped i found it very difficult to "step back" and look at the bigger picture. It is often the case that we can get "sidetracked" but this, that and the other, but as R Lee and Saint say, keep it nice and simple, a day at a time. Do not concenr yourself with tomorrow Re alcohol, just concentrate on chosing to be sober today.

Indeed we are all different, i live here in Blighty 1000's of miles away. However i firmly believe there are common drivers that empower sustained sobriety.

Rock bottom? It was for me....several of them. Having said that i have a good friend in France who was a journalist here in Blighty in his day. Raging alcoholic, never drank anything other than lager and copious amounts of it i must say. I was working in London at the time and he was working in Fleet Street. (Where our newspapers all used to be written). I would meet him like clockwork everyday at lunch for a "few". He drank for over 40 years, retired, sold up and went to live in France. 1 day i met him for lunch, as per usual. I had never seen him drunk, never gave his drinking another thought, .....it was "life". I walked in and he was drinking a soft drink "Dr Peppers". I asked him what was all that about and we sat down and told me that his alcohol consumption daily had been a huge millstone round his neck for so very long. He had seen his Dr and his liver was in very poor shape. I never noticed any of that. He has never drunk again.

Was that his rock bottom?....Was he living on the street with his dog and his bottle?....Nope a succesful journalist and now a wealthy one, who realised that alcohol was killing him day by day.

Sassyras, the very fact that you found this family, the effort you are putting into to understanding your journey and how alcohol has been affecting it, means if you stand back and see that bigger picture, you will feel darn right proud of yourself....and so you should. For me, what used to trip me up time and time again was complacency.

By taking it 1 day at a time, keeps that complacency away. Power to your elbow my friend.

Be peaceful, be gentle, keep it simple. Loveness to you Sassyras
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Unread 01-18-2015, 09:02 AM   #30
Tryntryagain
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(PS, the sweets thing is sugar replacement that alcohol gave you)

Loveness to you.
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Unread 01-18-2015, 11:52 AM   #31
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Tryn speaks truth. I have been sober almost 5 months, eat 5 or 6 cookies a day for the sugar craving and have lost 25 pounds. I am more active, enjoy life, and will work on the cookies when they become a problem.

My story is very much like Tryn's friend from Fleet Street. I drank for 50 years and did not quit until I was retired for 6 years. I am so proud of you for not waiting until double bypass, neuropathy, and GI problems, like I did. No one knew the toll it had taken on my body until I ended up in the hospital.

We are so lucky that our bottom did not included DWI's, jail, killing ourselves or others.

Congratulations! Keep up the good work.

Susie
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Unread 01-19-2015, 07:21 AM   #32
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I've always had a sweet tooth, so it would be hard to notice if I've upped my biccie quota (that one's for Tryn from a fellow Brit).

I'm finding that I'm starting to make the healthier choices I've always wanted to but never quite have because drinking doesn't exactly lend itself to a tremendously healthy lifestyle. I've been vegetarian since my teens, but drinking has meant I've eaten more than my fair share of junk food and snacks and had many nights when all I had was alcohol and cigarettes.

Now I've started exercising daily (something I've wanted to do for years but only managed sporadically) and begun to sort my diet out with a LOT more fresh fruit, vegetables and water. It's amazing that after only one week I'm able to notice a difference.
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Unread 01-19-2015, 10:35 AM   #33
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Good for you! I found my appetite for real food returned along with my pleasure in cooking.
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Unread 01-19-2015, 06:09 PM   #34
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Day 19, I have stayed in my jammies all day today… just didn't feel like going out into the world… That will be tomorrow when I return to work… But I made it through the weekend!!!

I ate a salad for dinner, which is better than I have been doing so I feel good about that…I feel good about a lot of things

Just thought I would check in & let ya all know I am still counting my days.. TY for your support & everyone have a great day!
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Unread 01-19-2015, 09:10 PM   #35
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SassyRas, Congratulations on 19 days. You sound good. Keep it up.
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Unread 01-19-2015, 11:31 PM   #36
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Whatever you're doing, it's working! Have a good week. Keep us posted.

Susie
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Unread 01-20-2015, 05:13 AM   #37
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Sassy as Congrats on 19 days and making it successfully through the weekend. Having a plan in place when we expect things to go hard, and especially for the times that unexpectedly arise can be critical. Urges can strike out of no where and can be overwhelming. Know this is normal. People, places and things can be triggers to drink. As always think through that first drink.

Peace,
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Unread 01-20-2015, 07:21 PM   #38
SassyRas
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Saint, Susie & Lee…
Ty for the encouragement, it means a lot to me
This is day 20 & I feel good, very good…

I was at work this afternoon & the bar manager from next door came by to thank me for being a middle man of sorts & she gave me a bunch of cards for free beers at the bar she manages as a TY for my help… I didn't have the heart to tell her I won't be needing those… so I just thanked her… FREE BEER… geez… I stowed them away in a drawer & will give them out to my customers… but FREE BEER!! LOL ( she could have given them to me last month, oh well) Just one of many things I will have to deal with in the future...

Have a great rest of your day,
Sassy
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Unread 01-20-2015, 11:03 PM   #39
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The irony is delightful!! Your sense of humor will help you through this.
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Unread 01-21-2015, 08:22 AM   #40
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Sassy, That is funny. Get rid of the quick.
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Unread 01-21-2015, 09:19 AM   #41
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You are doing well, much support to you.
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Unread 01-21-2015, 02:41 PM   #42
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Good evening Sassyras. Bright blessings to you.

I suggest you get friends with dogs and use the vouchers as frisbies!

Be peaceful and empty of vouchers. Loveness to you Sassyras
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Unread 01-21-2015, 06:53 PM   #43
jenm
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Isn't that the way it works, Sassyras? The good thing is today we can laugh about something like this instead of acting on it. You are doing great! Jenm
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Unread 01-21-2015, 07:45 PM   #44
SassyRas
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Day 21!!

So, I gave one of the vouchers to a good customer today…I made him smile

If I didn't or couldn't laugh about life, I think I would jump off a bridge….I have to find the humour in life & I do

TY for the continued encouragement, you all make me smile too

Sassy
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Unread 01-21-2015, 08:18 PM   #45
gmasusie
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Keep doin what you're doin!
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Unread 01-21-2015, 10:56 PM   #46
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After a road race there is often a beer tent. I'll hand off my ticket to someone else. These days I would much rather be outdoors than inside a bar drinking. Who has time for that. Not me, lol!!

You're doing great. Keep at it. My worst day sober is better than my best day drunk.

Saint
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Unread 01-22-2015, 09:55 AM   #47
R. Lee
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SassyRas, Great job.
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Unread 01-22-2015, 07:32 PM   #48
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That really is ironic about the beer tickets! Great that you can laugh about it.
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Unread 01-22-2015, 08:12 PM   #49
SassyRas
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I've gotta keep laughing, the irony in this world just cracks me up

Me sooo tired today, but day 22 has come & gone… a month will be here before I know it… Time is flying

I hope all of you are well

Sassy
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Unread 01-22-2015, 10:15 PM   #50
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Yes a month will be here before you know it. Then 6, then a year, 5 years then 10. Time flies. Don't wish your life away. Sobriety is it's own reward, day by day and it only gets better. Your doing great! Learn about addiction, learn about yourself. The past is gone. We learn from it and move forward.

Stay vigilant,
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