Addiction Survivors

Notices

Reply
Unread 01-26-2014, 05:52 PM   #1
Buddygirl
Junior Member
 
Posts: 9
Unhappy Am I in the wrong ,really need advice

Not sure where to start ... A year ago my hubby was arrested due partly to drinking ,he served a short time in prison where he admitted prescription and alcohol abuse,he came home a new man swearing off drink,didn't last long live kicked him out a few times since because he's pretty nasty with his words when he's drinking.he even disappeared during the night,our children are seeing this and are noticing all the signs.i kicked him out few days ago he couldn't hardly stand this time,he's come bk to see kids and cries which makes me feel so guilty,even the kids are sick of it,if I let him bk he will do it again if I don't I think he's gonna hit rock bottom,I don't know what to do
Buddygirl is offline   Reply With Quote
Unread 01-26-2014, 06:38 PM   #2
R. Lee
Senior Member
 
Posts: 4,984
Default

Buddygirl, Welcome to the site.
I speak as a recovering alcoholic. Everyone's bottom is different. Your husband has a bottom, divorce, jail, & even death.
Don't feel guilty by his choices. You don't have to live like this. You have choices.
There are support groups for family's of alcoholics like Al Anon & of course coming here.
Good luck with your choices.
R. Lee is offline   Reply With Quote
Unread 01-26-2014, 07:28 PM   #3
Buddygirl
Junior Member
 
Posts: 9
Unhappy

Thank you ,I have emailed al anon but no reply as of yet.its such a horrible situation at the moment.i got a lot of the blame when he went to prison and I'm feeling I'm gonna get the blame again for not sticking it out ,but every time he goes out I worry and when he returns I watch him to see if he's had a drink,it's draining me,it's affected my children ,I feel so bad I just wanna cry .hes not a bad bloke normally but drunk he's a right .......accusing me and making remarks
Buddygirl is offline   Reply With Quote
Unread 01-26-2014, 09:26 PM   #4
R. Lee
Senior Member
 
Posts: 4,984
Default

Buddygirl, You have to do what is best for your kids & you.
You have no control what others think of you dealing with a alcoholic husband.
They told me we alcoholics are not bad people, we just do bad things when we drink. I sure did. I roared through love ones lives. My wants came 1st. In 42 years of drinking I lost my job, divorced 3 times. I was 2 & 1/2 months shy of 61 when I sought help & started my journey to sobriety. I have to take my sobriety 1 day at a time. I have to work on my sobriety every day. I have to give back what was so freely given to me. This sight is one way I give back.
No alcoholic starts out drinking saying I want to be a alcoholic.
R. Lee is offline   Reply With Quote
Unread 01-26-2014, 11:16 PM   #5
jenm
Senior Member
 
Posts: 976
Default

Hi Buddygirl!

Nothing that your husband does or doesn't do is your fault. People may attempt to blame it on you, but it is ultimately up to you whether to take it on or not. As Lee said, everyone's bottom is different. Although my behavior was FAR from perfect, I have not had to spend time in prison or jails. Yet. If I go back to drinking, that could and would probably happen.

You must take care of yourself and your children. Please call al-anon if you haven't heard from them yet. There is support and people who have been through what you are going through right now. Children do not deserve to live like this, and neither do you. As long as your husband knows he can continue to cry and apologize and come home, he will continue to do exactly as he is doing now. Please know we are here for you and continue to share with us! This is a safe place. Jenm
jenm is offline   Reply With Quote
2 Users Say Thank You to jenm For This Useful Post:
Thank You (01-27-2014), Thank You (01-27-2014)
Reply

Thread Tools

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is Off
HTML code is Off




All times are GMT -4. The time now is 08:53 PM.


Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.7
Copyright ©2000 - 2019, vBulletin Solutions, Inc.
© 2014 Addiction Survivors