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Unread 05-17-2010, 06:24 PM   #301
Frankie
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Hi Lee and Carly,

Thanks to both of you for checking on me. I didn't take my wife to mom's yet as we keep changing our (her) minds. Do I dare say I feel a little bit more confident about not dringing? I really wouldn't mind getting 6 mo. in to see how I feel.

Seems like I read in "living sober" that at 6 mo. you feel better, but after 2 yrs. it's striking. Don't quote me on that as I could be full of it. Hope things are going good (ok is fine too) for both of you. Still having fun on the indian Lee? If not, you could drop it off at my place. Ha!

Frank
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Unread 05-17-2010, 10:32 PM   #302
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Frank, The Indian is lots of fun.
It is funny as you stay sober longer it gets easier not to always be thinking of drinking. We must always remember that alcohol is cunning, baffllng & powerful just waiting for you to get weak enough to think I can have just 1. That is how 1 day at a time works for me. Keep up the good work Frank!
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Unread 05-18-2010, 10:40 PM   #303
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Frank, The Indian is lots of fun.
It is funny as you stay sober longer it gets easier not to always be thinking of drinking. We must always remember that alcohol is cunning, baffllng & powerful just waiting for you to get weak enough to think I can have just 1. That is how 1 day at a time works for me. Keep up the good work Frank!
Hi Lee,

Still haven't been to a meeting, but at least i'm not drinking. Actually it's been sort of easy not to drink, and that scares me a bit, as I don't even have phone numbers if things get bad, and thats because I don't go to meetings. Really need to. Thanks Lee,

Frank
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Unread 05-19-2010, 10:08 AM   #304
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Frank, Go to a meeting & get some phone numbers. I could not stay sober by doing it all by myself.
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Unread 05-19-2010, 10:20 AM   #305
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I also never got anything from AA. I would very much like to stay with program but I am not sure how to. People appear to have succsess here, but I don't quite get it.
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Unread 05-19-2010, 08:30 PM   #306
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I also never got anything from AA. I would very much like to stay with program but I am not sure how to. People appear to have succsess here, but I don't quite get it.
Hi Miarich,

I guess if you hang out in aa long enough, something good happens. I can't comment on that part as I never stayed past 90 days. The good part is you are around others with drinking-drug problems. For me it's something I need to do, but don't.

When I went to meetings in the past, I only wanted to learn the "how to stop drinking thing", and nothing else mattered, but now i'm getting the drift that the drinking is caused by my incorrect thinking. I still don't get that part of it a whole lot, but hanging out on this forum is helping some of these things to seep in ever so slightly, but in just the same.

The problem with this forum is that you can't call people if you have a burning desire to drink. Going to meetings gets you those phone numbers. I have to say that now this forum is keeping me (helping) sober as these people here keep checking in on me. Are you still drinking? If so, I understand that one very well as I drank, but still checked in on this forum. Hope this helps a little.

Frank
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Unread 05-19-2010, 11:36 PM   #307
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Miarich, Hang around here. Take what you like & leave the rest. This is not an A.A. site. There are other ways to stop drinking.
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Unread 05-19-2010, 11:41 PM   #308
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Frank.God love you. You know what to do. I commend you on your post to Miarich. Keep up your great work staying sober & helping the suffering alcoholic who still suffers by your post. That helps you stay sober.
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Unread 05-23-2010, 03:57 PM   #309
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HI Frank,
Ditto on Lee's post - hope all is going well with you ! Carly : )
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Unread 05-24-2010, 01:14 AM   #310
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Thanks for checking on me Carly and Lee!

Frank
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Unread 06-05-2010, 01:10 PM   #311
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Frank,

What's going on Frank?

Saint
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Unread 06-05-2010, 02:12 PM   #312
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Frank,

What's going on Frank?

Saint
Hi Saint,

I posted on rewrite's thread that I drank last sunday after I took my wife to mom's, and only lacked 2 wks. of having 90 days. I guess i'm a glutton for punishment. Good to see you posting. Thanks for checking on me.

Frank
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Unread 06-05-2010, 02:47 PM   #313
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Frank,

Don't be too hard on yourself Frank. I think more importantly view that drinking incident it as a learning experience. What can you learn from it? What could you do differently or try the next time? Perhaps bring a friend with you next time you drop your wife off at her mother's for a visit.
It was only one day you drank. The other 76 days or so you successfully stayed sober! Pick the ball back up and run with it. The only limits in our lives are the ones we set for ourselves!

You are on the right path Frank. I wish you well.

Stay Strong, Stay Safe,
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Unread 06-05-2010, 02:53 PM   #314
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Frank,

Don't be too hard on yourself Frank. I think more importantly view that drinking incident it as a learning experience. What can you learn from it? What could you do differently or try the next time? Perhaps bring a friend with you next time you drop your wife off at her mother's for a visit.
It was only one day you drank. The other 76 days or so you successfully stayed sober! Pick the ball back up and run with it. The only limits in our lives are the ones we set for ourselves!

You are on the right path Frank. I wish you well.

Stay Strong, Stay Safe,
Saint
Thanks Saint!
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Unread 06-05-2010, 02:56 PM   #315
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You are very welcome Frank
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Unread 06-10-2010, 10:11 PM   #316
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Frank, How are you doing? Don't give up on yourself! Try a meeting & 1 day at a time. I'm not knocking you Frank I have been there & done what you did. Instead of looking to that 90 days in 2 weeks next time try staying sober 1 day at a time. Frank you help me stay sober.
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Unread 06-11-2010, 01:09 PM   #317
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Frank, How are you doing? Don't give up on yourself! Try a meeting & 1 day at a time. I'm not knocking you Frank I have been there & done what you did. Instead of looking to that 90 days in 2 weeks next time try staying sober 1 day at a time. Frank you help me stay sober.
Thanks Lee,

Went out targeting with some people and went to happy hour afterwords, so I guess i'm back to drinking once per week. Still checking the forum most every day, and thats about all i'm doing for now.

Frank
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Unread 06-11-2010, 02:06 PM   #318
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Frankie Today is a new day...Try not drinking JUST FOR TODAY...Remember keep your mind and body busy and the rest will follow. Dont think about the next day or the one after that... Just think about STAYING SOBER JUST FOR TODAY.....Remember ONE DAY AT A TIME.....My thoughts and prayers are with you. Please keep posting and let us know how you are doing...Take care Di
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Unread 06-11-2010, 02:07 PM   #319
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Frank,

Thanks for checking in. I've been thinking of you and wondering how you've been lately. How are you Frank? You okay with drinking once a week?

I've been in pain the last two days. End of the year parents/kids track mini meet. Ran the 100 meter and popped something in my left hamstring. Got beat by a bunch of 6th grade girls! : ) So I ran the 400 meter after that! That's a 1/4 mile.... Got beat again by a bunch of 6th grade girls. My daughter smoked my sorry arse : ). I am now paying the physical price of not excercising enough.

You take care of yourself Frank. Thinking good thoughts for you.

Stay Strong, Stay Safe
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Unread 06-11-2010, 05:15 PM   #320
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Frank, Keep checking in. You know what you have to do, so it is your choice. I pray for you. You are just an active alcoholic who chooses to drink. I have been there. We are not bad people just sick ones.
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Unread 06-11-2010, 05:18 PM   #321
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Saint I hope you did not hurt yourself too bad. Ain't it great to be a sober father & on top of that you are helping others to get sober or stay sober.
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Unread 06-11-2010, 05:29 PM   #322
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Lee,
I'll be o.k. in time. Just using some muscles in a fashion they are not accustomed to!
Yes it is terrific to be a sober father, and for that I am thankful. At this point I enjoy living life on life's terms, sober, the good and the bad. When you experience the 'bad' stuff and survive I find myself grateful for the 'good' stuff in ones life.
Next year I'm going to train some before I compete!

Take care Lee and Frank, Hang in there!

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Unread 06-12-2010, 03:18 AM   #323
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Hi Frank Im just checking to see how you are doing today? I hope all is well....Please let us know how you are doing..Thinking of you...Di
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Unread 06-12-2010, 12:46 PM   #324
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Hi Frank,

I am catching up with everyone, how has this week been going? I agree with the other posts - don't beat yourself up about the drink- it can often justify it in our minds to keep on drinking. You went a LOOONG time without a drink, you know you can do it and you knew what your triggers are , so I hope you don't punish yourself, get back on your path of what was working before.

Hang in there and take care ! Carly
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Unread 06-15-2010, 12:52 AM   #325
Frankie
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Hi Di, Carly, Saint & Lee, and...

Thanks very much for checking on me! You guy's are great. I guess i'm back to drinking once per week, but I drank twice last week. The drinking doesn't fit in very well with my new workout days, so it will have to be once only. I'm still checking the forum.

So you got skunked buy the kids a Saint? Ha! It could have been worse; it could have been by old ladies. Just kidding. I know a few things about pulling things, as in pulling my right achilles over two months ago, and it's still sore, and I did it just doing a runners stretch against a tree! Thanks for all the advice guy's!

Frank
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Unread 06-15-2010, 01:38 PM   #326
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Frank, Thanks for the update. Do you want to stop drinking or just control the amount your drinking?
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Unread 06-15-2010, 09:26 PM   #327
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Frank, Thanks for the update. Do you want to stop drinking or just control the amount your drinking?
Hi Lee, and thanks for asking,

Anyone who has a problem with drinking should stop altogeather period. Thats just my thoughts, and yes, I would like to stop. Thanks for checking on me Lee.

Frank
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Unread 06-15-2010, 09:55 PM   #328
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Frank work on it 1 day at a time. Best of luck friend.
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Unread 06-15-2010, 10:42 PM   #329
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Frank,

Yeah I laugh when I think about how bad the girls, the 6th grade girls, beat me. Even my daughter tried consoling me, telling me I didn't do that bad. It's been about a week and humpty dumpty(me) isn't back together yet!

I'm glad you want to stop drinking Frank because I believe as you do. People struggling with alcohol use do need to stop. I would like to see you stiop but the struggle is yours, but it is so very worth it, that fight for sobriety. I am no different than you Frank and I wish you the best Frank on your journey.

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Unread 06-16-2010, 11:33 AM   #330
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Hi Frank,

In regards to your comment, "Anyone who has a problem with drinking should stop altogeather period..." As my husband and I are both active, functioning alcoholics we seem to have a difference of opinion on the matter. He has made a half-hearted effort to slow down his drinking with no intention of stopping, ever. Although I have not been sucessful (yet) in quitting that is my ultimate goal. For now I am overall happy with my progress towards that goal. I firmly believe as you do that quitting altogether is essential for any alcoholic.

Your comment reinforces my gut instinct that I am on the right track. Thank you!

Take care,
Sully
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Unread 06-16-2010, 07:28 PM   #331
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Frank and Sulli All i can tell you guys is to take it one day at a time...Just for today i will not drink...Today is the start of a new begining..... Thinking of you guys always..Di
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Unread 06-16-2010, 09:19 PM   #332
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I'm aware of a young man about 20 years old. He had been arrested for drunk driving. He came to meetings for a few months. He was a very nice kid. I guess he had more drinking to do. Last night while driving a car drunk he killed a 54 year old man on a motorcycle.
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Unread 06-19-2010, 11:35 AM   #333
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Hi Frank,

Just checking in on you. You have already received great feedback so ditto to the above. I do worry/wonder how this is affecting your health? As in the past - you had some wicked days of recovering from drinking.
If I may ask - when you had all that time without alcohol, overall how was life ? Were you generally happy or merely just white knuckling it ?

All I can say is that if back in the day there had been a forum, I probably was in the same boat, wanting to stop , for years .... anyway hang in there and keep us posted .
Take care, Carly : )
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Unread 06-19-2010, 12:48 PM   #334
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Frank you can start over anytime & take it 1 day at a time.
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Unread 06-20-2010, 03:28 PM   #335
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Hi Frank,

Just checking in on you. You have already received great feedback so ditto to the above. I do worry/wonder how this is affecting your health? As in the past - you had some wicked days of recovering from drinking.
If I may ask - when you had all that time without alcohol, overall how was life ? Were you generally happy or merely just white knuckling it ?

All I can say is that if back in the day there had been a forum, I probably was in the same boat, wanting to stop , for years .... anyway hang in there and keep us posted .
Take care, Carly : )
Hi Carly,

Thanks for checking. Actually not drinking was easy until I took my wife to mom's. As far as things being better when I wasn't drinking, i'm not sure. I didn't really feel that much better. Maybe if I would have given it 6 mo., things would have been different. It does affect my health, so I know I have to stop. Thanks Carly,

Frank
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Unread 06-20-2010, 03:30 PM   #336
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Frank you can start over anytime & take it 1 day at a time.
Thanks Lee.

Frank
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Unread 06-20-2010, 04:04 PM   #337
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I'm aware of a young man about 20 years old. He had been arrested for drunk driving. He came to meetings for a few months. He was a very nice kid. I guess he had more drinking to do. Last night while driving a car drunk he killed a 54 year old man on a motorcycle.
Thats one big reason I stopped riding. There's no defence against drunks/drugies. I hope they throw the key away on him. Thats murder in my book. A lot of aa's disagreed with me on that one, but thats just how I feel. You make a choice to drink and drive.

It's not an acident that he got behind the wheel drunk, and now a poor guy is dead. I almost feel that he should be hung, but no, he might be out in 5 or 10 years to try it again. I've drank and drove before, but at some point you stop drinking and leave the bar while you can still drive safely.

I once got very drunk in a bar way up in the mountains, and had to drive my harley back home. I remember telling my friend that maybe it wasn't a real good idea for me get on it. I drove anyway and crashed it. If I would have killed someone, I would have expected to go down for it. Rant over.

Frank
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Unread 06-20-2010, 10:06 PM   #338
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Frank, This young man made the choice to drink & drive & killed a 54 year old man riding on a motorcycle. The man had 5 children & their mother died 10 years ago. It is not for me to judge him or any other active alcoholic. The courts will do that.
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Unread 06-20-2010, 11:14 PM   #339
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Hi Frank- glad to see you posting/checking in.

As to the debate you are both entitled to your opinion.

Take care of yourself Frank : ) Carly
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Unread 06-22-2010, 12:23 AM   #340
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Frank, This young man made the choice to drink & drive & killed a 54 year old man riding on a motorcycle. The man had 5 children & their mother died 10 years ago. It is not for me to judge him or any other active alcoholic. The courts will do that.
Lee - I guess we can agree to disagree, but active alcholic or inactive has nothing to do with it. I knew a wealthy man who took the life of a mother and her boy driving drunk. The folks at the party begged him to not leave because of very thick fog, but he did it anyway even after having dui's in the past. He felt he was above it all. He got a very long sentence which basically was life.

A 20 plus yr. sober aa frind of mine was trying to help him, so I understand how you feel about it, but I still judge the guy just like I judge gang bangers who shoot little kids. I understand the part that alcholics can't help drinking (a man living close to me is drinking himself to death), but they can stay out of cars when too drunk. Thats just my thoughts. You must have seen a lot of deaths caused by drunk driving in your line of work.

Frank
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Unread 06-22-2010, 12:37 AM   #341
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Hi Frank- glad to see you posting/checking in.

As to the debate you are both entitled to your opinion.

Take care of yourself Frank : ) Carly
Hi Carly,

Thanks for checking this part of the forum, and you are right about me being intitled to my opinion, just not Lee. Just kidding Lee! Ha! Thanks to both of you.

Frank
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Unread 06-22-2010, 10:31 PM   #342
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Frank, I know you are just kidding. R. Lee does not run the show. I hope your OK Frank.
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Unread 06-28-2010, 03:58 PM   #343
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Hello everyone. This is my first post. Some of your stories are really heartbreaking and I sincerely hope you find the help and strength you need to live your best life. That's what I want to do, but I've simply been "afraid" or embarrassed to ask for the help because
(1) I'm ashamed to admit my problem to my own doctor; and
(2) My husband says that once I admit it and it goes on my health record that it could affect our insurance premiums or make it difficult for me to even obtain health insurance if I ever needed to. I have health insurance now, but I had problems getting it because of another relatively insignificant health issue.

Many of you may consider my addiction as "lightweight" but I'm alcohol dependent nonetheless. I polish off most of a 1.5L bottle of chardonnay every evening and have been for over 30 years. I've been blessed with good health most of my life, but I don't think that's going to continue if I don't do something about this obvious problem. At 60, I feel like my brain is starting to turn to mush. Drinking has become a past time of both my husband and I and has lead to serious problems with our son, who also struggles with it. My parents didn't drink at all, but my husband's family are all alcoholics. The great irony here is that we own a brewery! Good thing for me it's not a vineyard! But we are fully enmeshed in an alcoholic environment and I really do enjoy my wine. I have a great life, a bit hectic for sure, and a loving supportive husband. I have tried twice to quit cold turkey, but have been plagued by migraines whenever I do this. So I'm thinking the best option for me is to reduce my intake with this drug Naltrexone and would love to hear from people in a similar situation that have been on this medication and how it has worked out for them and how do I go about getting this medication given my concerns stated above? Thanks for listening. ~Gael
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Unread 06-28-2010, 04:25 PM   #344
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Hi Gael,

Thank you so much for posting. Reaching out as you have takes lots of courage so be proud of yourself. I'm a 31-year-old alcoholic, married to a wonderful supportive husband who happens to be an alcoholic as well. We both come from alcoholic families. We have two young beautiful children together, live in a wonderful modest home in a nice neighborhood. We are blessed with a wonderful life. That is, except for my (not so) little drinking problem.

Like you I have never had the courage to seek professional help. Until now anyhow. My first counseling appointment is tomorrow evening; I'm nervous as all can be! Also like you I polish off nearly a whole 1.5L bottle of chardonnay nearly every day. I don't know how that compares to other alcoholics. I guess it doesn't really matter--we all have the same problem.

You've come to the right place, posting here. The folks on this forum have been so kind and understanding. Every day I look forward to hearing from them. Without support from people like you I'm not sure I ever would have had the courage to face my alcoholism. I need to know there are others out there like me. We are here for you to provide feedback, encouragement or just be a listening ear. This is also a great resource for help and education about alcoholism.

I look forward to hearing from you again soon. Take care!

Sincerely,
Sullivan
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Unread 06-28-2010, 04:46 PM   #345
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Gael, Welcome to the site! My computer is down & I'm working off a notebook when I can get to it. I will post later. Good luck.
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Unread 06-29-2010, 10:28 AM   #346
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Gael View Post
Hello everyone. This is my first post. Some of your stories are really heartbreaking and I sincerely hope you find the help and strength you need to live your best life. That's what I want to do, but I've simply been "afraid" or embarrassed to ask for the help because
(1) I'm ashamed to admit my problem to my own doctor; and
(2) My husband says that once I admit it and it goes on my health record that it could affect our insurance premiums or make it difficult for me to even obtain health insurance if I ever needed to. I have health insurance now, but I had problems getting it because of another relatively insignificant health issue.

Many of you may consider my addiction as "lightweight" but I'm alcohol dependent nonetheless. I polish off most of a 1.5L bottle of chardonnay every evening and have been for over 30 years. I've been blessed with good health most of my life, but I don't think that's going to continue if I don't do something about this obvious problem. At 60, I feel like my brain is starting to turn to mush. Drinking has become a past time of both my husband and I and has lead to serious problems with our son, who also struggles with it. My parents didn't drink at all, but my husband's family are all alcoholics. The great irony here is that we own a brewery! Good thing for me it's not a vineyard! But we are fully enmeshed in an alcoholic environment and I really do enjoy my wine. I have a great life, a bit hectic for sure, and a loving supportive husband. I have tried twice to quit cold turkey, but have been plagued by migraines whenever I do this. So I'm thinking the best option for me is to reduce my intake with this drug Naltrexone and would love to hear from people in a similar situation that have been on this medication and how it has worked out for them and how do I go about getting this medication given my concerns stated above? Thanks for listening. ~Gael
Hi Gael and welcome,

First I have to say that I laughed out loud when I reached the part that you own a brewery, and glad it's not a winery. Ha!

But next I have to say that if you are self employed, you might want to think it over about before letting it all hang out with a Dr. about your drinking. Health insurance companies are not fuzzy bunnies out to help you "like a good neighbor," it's more like they will find any excuse whether legal or not to drop you if they are faced with having to pay a claim.

It's only in health insurance that they can legally drop you for no real reason and get away with it. I learned this the hard way by listening to some well intentioned AA's who told me to come clean with everything. I did, and wound up paying several thousand bucks for a false alarm hospital stay after being dropped. It would have cost me 20 grand to get back 4 if I would have sued them.

Hope to see you posting more, and like you, I'm still drinking. Good luck,

Frank
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Unread 06-29-2010, 11:14 AM   #347
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Frank, I know you are just kidding. R. Lee does not run the show. I hope your OK Frank.
Thanks for the words Lee, and I guess I'm doing ok. Still hard headed and running the show. Things going ok your way, family and all? Did your head clear up after being sober for 5 years? Whats left of my brain seems to have gone on strike. A senior moment has turned into a senior year. See all the fun your missing?

Frank
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Unread 06-30-2010, 12:34 PM   #348
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All right Frank, what's going on, what are you doing for fun these days? You taking care of yourself?

Saint
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Unread 07-03-2010, 07:58 AM   #349
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All right Frank, what's going on, what are you doing for fun these days? You taking care of yourself?

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Not doing much of anything Saint. Still drinking. Hope your doing better.

Frank
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Unread 07-04-2010, 08:36 PM   #350
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Frank,

Hi Frank, good to hear from you. Things are generally OK. Still settling into the new house. Much to do, much I would like to do, so little time : ) Having a down day. My daughter is up the camp with her best friend and my ex wife. It was one of those family events I really enjoyed. Had some good times with the girls years past so there's some sadness over missing out. Overall, I am not complaining life is to short!

Take care of yourself Frank and stay safe. I'm going to take my chubby Black Lab for a walk. He can sleep later... the life he has!

Saint
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