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Unread 08-21-2015, 01:54 PM   #51
Hermosa
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Default Day 37/ 5 weeks/ 1 month+

Angie! Thank you so much for your note, everything you said is super helpful to hear! Thats so funny about your boyfriend saying, “you are wearing THAT?” cause I can totally relate, its exactly what my husband says. Mostly cause he knows I usually love to get dressed up and cute. Gosh, I don’t know what I’d do with out you all and this site. Its so nice to know I’m not totally going nuts or alone

I just got back from my trip, it was so nice to get away and be with family I’m still struggling with my energy + general aches (didn’t even bother to pack well or put on makeup the entire time) but I must say, I do feel like it might be SLOOOOOWLY getting better. Looking back this week seems like it was just a tiny bit better than last and so on. The 3 month note REALLY helps to hear , its still a long ways away for me but at least it gives me something work towards/look forward to. It gets really hard for me when I start to think “maybe this is the new normal”, "what if this fatigue/these aches never go away”!?! and then I start to panic, but I can totally work with giving it another month or two.

Hope everyone is having the most wonderful week! Looking forward to the weekend and getting a few days closer to week 6.



BTW (Angie) I’ve had major blood work done twice in the last 6months and last time I had my thyroid checked as well. Looks like I’m good on all fronts so I can’t blame it on that :P
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Unread 08-22-2015, 07:02 AM   #52
NancyB
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Hi Hermosa, glad you had a nice trip! For the general aches, one thing to think about is that you had been taking a painkiller for the 3+ years of bupe and however long before that. So those are aches may have been masked by the painkillers. I guess I'm saying, don't write them off as part of the bupe jump, especially if it gets really painful. Does aspirin, ibuprofen or acetaminophen, or maybe a combo like execedrin with the caffeine help at all?

You're getting there! Especially if you did notice a difference, albeit tiny, from last week.

Hope you have a great weekend!

Nancy
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Unread 08-23-2015, 01:23 PM   #53
Hermosa
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Happy Weekend!! and thanks for the notes, I LOVE them!

I do feel like it's getting a TINY bit better week by week... MUCH SLOOOWER than I would like (or even expect) but I'm moving along and the fact that I can see even tiny bit of difference weekly is helpful.

One thing I havent shared is HOW much of a difference my friends and family who aren't around me every day have noticed... I unexpectedly hear it ALL the time, things like "you seem like you're doing SO much better", "we can tell by the way you talk, act and carry yourself", "you just seem so much healthier" (totally unprompted). I might not feel great (in fact sometimes I feel pretty terrible) but they seem to notice something good and to be honest it always really shocks me... I was SUPER physically healthy before getting off the bupes and felt pretty stable, thats a HUGE part of what prompted me to want off them and start this journey in the first place. Its hard for my husband + I to see what their talking about because we're living it day-to-day (he wasn't on bupes but is going through the process via living with me). It makes me think I must have been really bad? Either way, they all say they've seen a HUGE difference in me (for the positive) since I first reduced down from 24mg to .5mg AND even more since I've been completely off them. Thats good news and VERY motivating. If they all think I'm doing so much better- I DONT want to go back!! haha.

As for the aches + pains, you're definitely right... I'm sure it's a bunch of stuff that's been covered up by the bupes for the past 3.5 years. What I worry about most is when I get a month of KILLER cramps and how/what I'll do when that happens (but maybe I'll get pregnant before than and not have to worry about it!! *FINGERS CROSSED*).

The daily aches are REALLY annoying, but nothing I haven't been able to handle (the HARDEST part for me is STILL dealing with the lack of energy and general malaise, UGH some days are just SO KILLER). I've been able to get by daily using Giga's "Turmeric Pain" 1-3X's daily and Alive (I try to cut back on all of it as much as possible, but I still want to get through my days without being totally useless). Also, I've still been doing the Hydrotherapy in the shower and whenever I'm around a pool + hottub and I CAN'T say enough HOW MUCH good it does for pain and your immune system!

Yesterday I went on a 5+ mile hike with friends and it was AWESOME! I was slow and it was hard, BUT it made me feel so so SO good! I know I need more HARD workouts like that in my daily life, but when I'm fighting the fatigue and malaise it's all I can do to even take a mellow walk (but I push through the best I can). It's been SUPER helpful for me to latch onto others momentum and motivation whenever it's around. I'm always praying for more of it in my life.

How's everyones weekend going so far?? Sending love to all of you.


(day 39)

Last edited by Hermosa; 08-23-2015 at 01:29 PM..
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Unread 08-25-2015, 06:50 AM   #54
NancyB
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Hi Hermosa, glad to see that you are noticing a difference, albeit not as quickly as you would like. Maybe when you start to feel like you're not getting any better or it's moving more slowly, just remember what everyone is telling you. That is huge!! They're seeing things you and your husband aren't because, like you said, you're living it every day. So, you're doing way better than you actually think. If that makes sense.

In addition to the 3.5 years you took bupe, you have to add on the time you were taking whatever opiate prior to you being prescribed bupe. So adding that on, you've not had to deal with those aches and pains for a while now. But when you think about it, you're really doing fabulous off of ALL opiates for 41 days now! I'll keep my fingers crossed for you that you won't get cramps because you'll be pregnant.

Pat yourself on the back on how well you're doing. I'm really proud of you!!

Nancy
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Unread 08-27-2015, 09:11 AM   #55
GirlGettingOffSubs
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Hi Hermosa!

Sorry it's been awhile since I've written, my life has been pretty insane lately. I am glad others are noticing your improvement, that's usually how it is. It's so hard for us to see it in ourselves since we do deal with it day in and day out.

Wish you could come over here I'd get your butt moving, I am getting ready to do my morning Jillian Michaels workout. It's only 20 minutes haha I know you could do that if you took a 5 mile hike! Power in numbers, I hear that for sure.

Anyhow, keep up the great work! Oh- I have been taking Motrin like candy lately so don't stress out over the Aleve. I try to be pretty holistic and natural but boy sometimes Motrin is sure my friend, although you are a better one.

Keep us posted on how you are doing!
Hugs,
Angie
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Unread 08-28-2015, 03:29 PM   #56
Hermosa
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Default Day 44 / Week 6 / 1.5 Months

Its day 44 in week 6, about 1.5 months in and I really think I may have turned a big corner this week (*I hope*)

I actually got really stick Tuesday night with a stomach/IBS flare-up, something that hasn't happened to me in ages. It only lasted about 36hrs and it was pretty terrible (I literally spent the entire night/day in and out of the bathtub), BUT IRONICALLY I got out of it and still feel like this was one of the easiest weeks yet! I just don't feel as achy and tired as I have been AND maybe the distraction of a different kind of pain was actually helpful!? Whatever it is, I hope the good feelings continue!

Another good things is, the uncontrollable hunger seems to have finally taken a back seat and I can't even tell you how happy I am about that!
I still have an extra 20lbs I racked on since my taper began in February I would LOVED to get off (mostly due to crazy hunger + some long periods of inactivity)… I was on the slim side so I’m trying to give myself a break, but I'd like to get at least 10 of them off because the clothing situation is a problem!
... Slow and steady wins the race, right!?



Thanks for all the support! I love you guys so much! Seriously, you have no idea.

Angie, I wish I was close by, I would totally come over and get my workout on with you!! Would be awesome to have you as a real life buddy! I need to get out of the house more than anything, but the workout videos aren't a bad ideas + I might give them a try. So funny what you were saying about popping Motrin like candy, I try to be cool cause I don’t want to mess up my stomach, but some days are just like that and you have to do whatever will get you though plus ANYTHING is better than the Opiates.

Nancy, You are the best! Thanks so much for the good vibes/well wishes and support… I sure am hoping for positive pregnancy signs!! I should know in a few days and will definitely keep you posted. Thanks for helping me keep things in perspective.

Hows everyone been doing this week???
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Unread 08-30-2015, 07:12 AM   #57
NancyB
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Hi Hermosa, I hope you're feeling even better and that was the last corner you ned to turn in the process! Sorry you got so sick. Maybe that different pain was a distraction. A distraction you could have done without though. May that flare up be the last one for a long time for you.

It's been a few days since you last posted - any pregnancy news? Keeping my fingers crossed that it a positive!!!

Nancy
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Unread 08-31-2015, 10:20 AM   #58
GirlGettingOffSubs
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Hey Hermosa-

So sorry about the IBS flare up! Your attitude is absolutely amazing though and I am glad you can see some positive out of it.

Yes this morning if you were here, we would have done a 20 minute Jillian micharls kettle ball routine. Haha. I need to get out of the house too, but now my car has died so I am really stuck. I like my own company though, and having a dog is a godsend.

Slow and steady is right! When I tapered and jumped I was hungrier but only craved healthy food though. I am the weird exception I guess, bc I gained a lot of weight on subs so it's nice to have it off. My sweet tooth comes around here and there but nothing like it was on subs, it was bizarre.

Anyhow, congrats and keep up the awesome work buddy!
Hugs,
Angie
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Unread 09-02-2015, 02:14 PM   #59
Hermosa
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Default 7 weeks! Day 49

7 weeks! Day 49

The change back to normal has been sloooow, BUT it's happening AND albeit very small, each week gets a tiny bit better! I wouldn't go so far as to say I'm all better (not even close), but I feel like I may have finally started to see the other side and I like it!


Angie- what kind of puppy do you have? Been dying to get a little furry friend, but we have to move soon and it's SO HARD to find places that will allow dogs out here... BUT hopefully someday soon I can adopt one!

Nancy- no news, not good news this time around oh well... This month is another shot, I've got faith + a LOT of prayer.
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Unread 09-03-2015, 11:19 AM   #60
GirlGettingOffSubs
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Hi Hermosa,

Our little puppy (haha he is 13) is half bichon and half Pomeranian. However he looks like neither. Too big- 37lbs, medium size, and dirty blonde with wavy fur. He is the best. I don't know what I'd do without him. He lays and watches me when i exercise. He is too funny. He gets possessive, growls at bf when he leaves for work or gets too close to me. I love it. I am his mama. He is so spoiled.

In other news we are planning on moving in the next few weeks, it will be good- Saving money so we can eventually buy a house and at least the heat is gas instead of oil- that's too much to pay in the winter. Too too much.

Well I hope you are having a great day. The high here is in the 90s plus humidity which is no good. Hang in there it's such a slow process tapering and jumping. But you are doing it which is fantastic. I am so proud of you!
Hugs,
Angie
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Unread 09-09-2015, 06:19 AM   #61
NancyB
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Hi Hermosa, it's been a little while, just wanted to check in and see how you're doing.

Hopefully you're doing well and just busy with life.

Nancy
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Unread 09-09-2015, 07:28 PM   #62
Hermosa
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Question Day 56 / 8 Weeks!

8 weeks today! (+ Monday will be 2 months!!)

I turned a corner around the 6-8 week mark and had been feeling a WHOLE lot better (not perfect but functional + generally better) and then today out of nowhere, BAM! I got another one of those, ass-tired, feels like I got hit by a train, I can’t get off the couch days… Agh, will the insanity ever end!?! I can’t complain too much though because as bad as it is, it's only a fraction of the intensity it had been.

Motivation where are you!?


Angie, we’re moving in the next few weeks too… Ugh so stressful! Hopefully you have a cute new place to move into?

Nancy, Thank you for checking in! I’d been doing a WHOLE lot better, but todays been kind of tough.. Really hard to get off the couch BUT trying to drink a lot of water and hoping I wake up tomorrow feeling better! How have you been??
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Unread 09-10-2015, 06:52 AM   #63
NancyB
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Hi Hermosa, congratulations on 8 weeks! That's fabulous! When you get days like you had yesterday, try and remember that it can happen to anyone. I think many people get a day like that every now and then when life just catches up to us and we're just exhausted. I've seen a bit of that around here with the heat and humidity that won't quit. A lot of people just get sapped of energy.

You're doing great pushing forward!! Hope that yesterday was just 'one' of those days and you're feeling much better today.

Nancy
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Unread 09-10-2015, 10:42 AM   #64
GirlGettingOffSubs
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Hi Hermosa!

Sorry about the bad day, I would get those here and there then I realized it was pms related most of the time.

I am so proud of you! Two months is awesome! That's funny you are moving too. It's such a pain. The new place is nice but smaller, which is fine bc we are saving money. So that's good bc bf's work slows down in the winter and we want to save to buy a place eventually. The cost of living is insane here. But the new neighborhood is better and more waking the dog friendly. So I am excited but I hate carpet and even though it's brand new (no stains but hopefully has off-gassed) it's good for puppers who tends to slip and slide on hardwood even with his nails trimmed and paw pad hairs cut. How is your new place?

Anyhow I hope you are feeling better, keep us posted! And don't forget how many people you are inspiring
Hugs,
Angie
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Unread 09-19-2015, 06:59 AM   #65
NancyB
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Hi Hermosa, checking in to see how you're doing. Let us know when you have time.

Nancy
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Unread 09-24-2015, 02:40 PM   #66
Hermosa
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Default Day 71 / 10 Weeks

XX

Last edited by Hermosa; 09-24-2015 at 02:44 PM..
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Unread 09-24-2015, 02:43 PM   #67
Hermosa
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Default Day 71 / 10 Weeks

Checking in!

I noticed at about 1.5-2 months I really started to feel better and shortly after (around 9 weeks) I FINALLY STOPPED counting every single day that went by!! and what a HUGE relief that has been!

In general I'm doing pretty good. There's been some pretty big stressors going on (moving, finding a new place, family), but I've been keeping busy (taking classes, got a new part-time job) which is HUGE for me! In feeling better and moving forward.

The aches barely come around anymore and when they do its with MUCH less intensity, the tiredness and lack of motivation peeks in and out from time to time, but again with much less intensity. I still struggle a bit, but it in no way feels like it's pulling me down against my will as it felt in the beginning... Lately, things sometimes feel like a challenge, but one that is manageable!

I'm still struggling with the weight I put during my taper/jump... Its vanity weight for me, but when you live in yoga pants because your whole wardrobe has suddenly shrunk 2-3 sizes, it makes a HUGE difference in how I feel. I still make an effort to get out and walk (do my 10,000 steps), but I know I could clean up my eating and push myself to get out and REALLY workout! The lbs just feel like they WON'T budge at all! I'm working on it day-by-day, but cut myself a break because the truth is 20lbs is SO WORTH finally getting off the bupes. I will lose the weight as I keep getting stronger and stronger!!

The more I think about it and reflect, I would say... I am feeling and doing very well. I'm optimistic because in a very substantial way I can see/feel how much better I am!!



Thanks for checking in Nancy!!

Nancy & Angie, How have you been doing?? What's new with both of you!?
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Unread 09-25-2015, 06:25 AM   #68
NancyB
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Hi Hermosa! What a fabulous post to read! Glad you stopped counting days, it probably puts everything in the background now. Especially with taking classes and a part-time job. That's so good to hear.

Have you thought about doing a food diary to help you 'clean up' your eating? A couple of places that have them are Livestrong.com and myfitnesspal.com It might help you to see what/how much you're eating and help you put some balance into it. Just don't rush it. As you said, it will come off as you keep getting stronger.

I'm really proud of you for pushing through, especially when you had absolutely no energy!

I'm thrilled for you.

Nancy
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Unread 11-27-2015, 12:28 PM   #69
Hermosa
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Default 4 Months/19-weeks

Hi all! Just wanted to take a second and check in... So far I've make it 4months (about 19 weeks) off bupes!! For the most part in feeling great these days i recently got a full-time job that helps a lot too... Things aren't too shabby!

On this Thanksgiving I am feeling very thankful! Love you all and thanks for all your support throughout this process. XO!!
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Unread 11-28-2015, 05:43 AM   #70
NancyB
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Hi Hermosa, congrats on 4 months! That's wonderful to know you're feeling well, and have a new job! How exciting!

I'm so glad you stopped by to let us know how you're doing. I hope you have a very happy holiday season and a fabulous new year (if we don't hear from you before then).

Nancy
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Unread 11-28-2015, 03:54 PM   #71
GirlGettingOffSubs
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Hey Hermosa!

Yayay for you! Congrats and awesome work and for the new job! I am happy you stopped by! Have a joyous holiday season, and I know you will . Don't be a stranger, we are still here for you!
Hugs,
Angie
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