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Unread 07-14-2015, 10:44 AM   #1
LokiLou
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Default When is enough enough?

My spouse has always been a drinker, but over the last two years it's increased to a uncomfortable amount... 6 pack a day, sometimes more, sometimes less. I've found cans hidden all over my house and even have found liquor bottles as well. Yesterday he took the day off to watch our kids, and he had vacation time, and I came home to him unshowered (since Friday) the house a wreck and him already started on his 6 pack - at 2pm.
But I'm the lazy jerk.

When does it ever end? When do they finally GET IT?
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Unread 07-16-2015, 09:38 AM   #2
R. Lee
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LokiLou, Welcome to the site. Looks like he might have a problem. Does he think he has a problem. He has to want to get sober for himself. You have choices too. You do not have to live like this. There are support groups for the famlies of alcoholics like Al Anon.

Good luck
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Unread 07-18-2015, 03:33 PM   #3
lostdog
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Your husband needs consequences for his actions, do not enable him at all. He may see it if you are not there to do things for him. Get help as R.Lee states on how to deal with it. Best wishes and much support to you and if you need more support , keep posting.
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Unread 12-30-2016, 09:49 AM   #4
LokiLou
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Long overdue update.

Hes moved on to abusing norco and also pot.
When we entered counseling 20 months ago, i always said that pot was my line in the sand. We go to counseling in a few days where I will lay it all out. He either chooses us, or he chooses that.
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Unread 12-30-2016, 02:35 PM   #5
NancyB
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Hi LokiLou, so sorry to hear what's going on.

Stand your ground. Don't let him manipulate you or make you feel sorry for him. You need to take care of yourself and your kids above all else.

Nancy
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Unread 02-20-2017, 06:37 PM   #6
1418
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I am sorry for what you are going through. Be strong. You've got this!
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Unread 05-01-2017, 11:51 AM   #7
LokiLou
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And a update... after saying he would stop the pot, he now is smoking it daily and came clean to me about it last week. His world is about to implode.
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Unread 05-01-2017, 12:12 PM   #8
lostdog
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keep standing your ground, have a plan to escape and go for help if violence starts, please take care and bless you.
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Unread 05-01-2017, 08:46 PM   #9
LokiLou
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So, he started the pot so he could stop the drinking....
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Unread 05-02-2017, 07:31 AM   #10
soapdish
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Hi there,

I'm sorry for what you're going through. Please know that you aren't alone.

I sense irony in your post. You sound angry. That's understandable. Do you mean he hasn't stopped drinking? So now he's drinking and smoking pot?

If you want to talk it through, we're here to listen.

All the best
Xxxx
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Unread 05-02-2017, 08:21 AM   #11
LokiLou
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Apparently now he's no longer going to drink but just smoke. I am just so pissed off about it.
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Unread 05-02-2017, 04:46 PM   #12
soapdish
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Hi again,

Yes I can imagine that is hurtful, and making your blood boil.
If pot is still the line in the sand, then I think you know what to do. Like with children, ultimatums have to be carried through or they are just perceived as empty threats.
Are you still going to counselling together? Do you have some support from friends/family/local support groups?

Tell us more if it will help you work your thoughts out.
I wish you the best in your decisions. Please put the children and yourself first.

hugs
x
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Unread 05-03-2017, 03:45 PM   #13
LokiLou
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Currently STILL in counseling, good gracious. I am going to our church tomorrow to get some additional guidance...
At least I went back to school last year and now have a degree that will allow me to be more independent, if need be...
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Unread 05-04-2017, 05:53 AM   #14
soapdish
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Good. I am glad you have some back up.
Let us know how it goes.

All the best to you
Hugs
Xxx
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