Addiction Survivors


Unread 03-01-2007, 02:33 PM   #1
Posts: 46
Default anyone start sub after being clean for awhile

I know many here have continued to use right up until the day they started their sub treatment and that is great and normal. To not really have to go through wd's and stay somewhat comfortable is a great thing. I have really never posted my sub induction story and maybe I should because I was actually clean for 3 months before I started sub.

There are many reasons for this and I have long history of relapse and when I do addiction I do it well, but when I do recovery I also do that well, all or nothing, isn't that the addict way, haha.

Anyway, just curious about the sub after being clean for awhile. I'll post my induction a little later as I do not have a lot of time right now.
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Unread 03-01-2007, 02:53 PM   #2
Posts: 53

I am very interested to hear this story. It seems we may have a lot in common as far as relapse goes. Please post.

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Unread 03-01-2007, 03:50 PM   #3
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Posts: 11,335

Yes I agree please do post it and the motivation behind it. I know of people here locally who could use to hear it.

Thanks, Mike
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Unread 03-01-2007, 04:58 PM   #4
Posts: 46

I am currently working on my complete story and it is taking longer than I thought, but here is a quick recap of my use and treatment history to the best of my hazy knowledge. I left out all the outpatient treatment because in my case every time I relapsed or came out of treatment I attended outpatient for 6 months to a year so that can just be added to all of the following.

age 19 - first tried H(snort) six months later started shooting

ages 19 to 21 - used H everyday

age 21 - 3 in hospital detoxes
35 day inpatient rehab
relapsed every time within a week of getting out

age 22 - 1 in hospital detox
arrested 3 times(2 petit larceny, 1 contempt of court for violating order of protection
county jail for 35 days
inpatient rehab for 35 days
6 months halfway house
first real clean time working a program(1 year of clean time)
sentenced to 3 years probation for arrests(after all the treatment)

age 23 - relapsed on H for 5 weeks
jailed for violation of probation(21 days)
straight from jail to 21 day inpatient rehab
sentenced to continue the rest of my probation

ages 23-25 - stayed clean for 2 years
relapsed for 2 weeks
not violated, but given the chance to prove I could get clean, which I did at home with help of clonidine, phenobarb

ages 25-27 - stayed clean for 1.5 years

ages 27-28 - relapsed with hydro,oxy and back to H
detoxed in hospital 7-10 times
relapsed every time
arrested 2 times for petit larceny
homeless on streets

ages 28-29 - October of 2005 detoxed in hospital for last time
came home to my son and girlfriend
stayed clean from October 2005 until present(1year 4months) December 2005 sentenced to 1 year of drug court for arrests
started outpatient in January of 2006
started suboxone in January of 2006, continued through present

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Unread 03-01-2007, 09:00 PM   #5
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Posts: 624

I started suboxone (the second time) after being clean for a little over a month. Granted, a month is not long, but obviously I didn't have to deal with worrying about the induction phase. I did it because I knew without a doubt that I'd never stop taking the pills. I so desperately wanted to not want to take pills, and to actually still be a happy person. So that's why I started.
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Unread 03-01-2007, 11:01 PM   #6
Posts: 46

The reason I started on suboxone after 3 months clean was for a couple reasons.

The first being that the only way in my town to get on sub locally without having to travel 40 miles was to join the outpatient clinic in town. I had been to it since I was 19 off and on so most of the counsleors knew me very well and I live in a small city and some of the people who worked their had known me my entire life and actually one counselor was a very good friend of mine growing up. I had built up a very strong relationsip with the clinic and they were very willing to pull strings to get me in and going. Suboxone was only a few months old 16 months ago so they all recommended it to me and I was told by one counselor that the clinic's doctor had over 30 patients and could not take anymore, but those strings I talked about were pulled and even if they weren't the doctor said he had a hard time turning anyone away as long as they were in treatment at the clinic.

The only problem was that I kept putting off going to my first appointment which was with a counsleor for intake and I skipped 3 intake appointments. Finally the only way I could do an intake was to meet with a supervisor to see if I would be accepted due to my lack of showing up so many times. The supervisor happened to be an old counselor of mine who was now promoted. I guess I had to pushed or threatened into almost not being able to attend the clinics program unless I showed some motivation. The key to getting into the suboxone maitnenacne program was the only way you could get an appointment with the doctor was to do the intake evaluation and speak with a counselor. So this was part of the delay of getting on suboxone.

One thing I forgot to mention was that the last detox I went to in October 2005 I was detoxed with subutex over 3 days and then released with a script for 26 2 mg suboxone pills, but my insurance would not cover it and I was homeless and broke. Kind of ironic that my insurance at the time would pay for inpatient detox with sub, but not help when I was released and really vulnerable.

The biggest reason or reasons I got on suboxone 3 months later was I had planned on getting in sub mainteneace at some point, but my last run was so bad and I had hit a bottom like no other after having put together a good run of clean time before my last relaps all led to a feeling of defeat and a sense that if I did not get help in the beiginning months that I was doomed to relapse again and it was not going to end pretty. I was scared, mostly because my cravings were so bad and my stress levels were killing me. I had ruined my entire life again and it was at a point where I had worked so hard for 3 years to get my life in order to have only thrown it all away(almost).

If anyone can clean on their first attempt, by all means do it. I have learned the hard way that by thinking I could control my use or stop even though I knew I couldn't, but still said it was gonna be different, that everytime it is harder to get up and harder to find the hope and stremgth to do it all over again. And after awhile I had less and less people who would stand by me, not because they didn't care, but becasue they cared too much and they too were spent from all the attempts in the past.
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Unread 03-02-2007, 12:41 AM   #7
Posts: 92

I got on Suboxone after three months of continuously being clean. I had such bad cravings I would shake and have panic attacks, so I got on sub. It's worked out great so far. Well, the medication, not so much the doctor...
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Unread 03-07-2007, 02:30 PM   #8
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Posts: 119

You are telling my story!...Pretty much. Relapse was a big thing for me..even after I had more than 10 years clean! It's amazing...the monster sleeps until we do something to wake him up and rear his UGLY head!
That is where I am at now...I 've been on methadone (after a short vicodin/perc run ) for four years. Never a high dose and a down to 8mg with the intention of going all the way. The problem is, although I did intend to get off, I am doing it a lot sooner than anticipated because I moved so far away from the clinic and now it's a two hr commute that does not only effect me! So for all involved I cut my dose two weeks ago from 17mgs to 8 mgs...and I am just now ok. So instead of the next big jump down and more discomfort, I'd like to try sub.... I signed up for the dr/patient locater but so far nothing. I have great insurance the empire plan, I just need to find someone who accepts it...$600 for the initial visit is out of my range for now....So I'll keep praying!
Have a good one...all!
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Unread 03-07-2007, 04:14 PM   #9
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i went to rehab with a girl who was clean for two months before she came to rehab. she had to wait because of insurance purposes to get in. she had told me that she had gotten clean several times before but it only lasted several months. i told her about suboxone and she told the facility doctor and asked for suboxone. she really had to beg to get it but finally did. she started after about being there 3 days. she said she felt so much more positive about her recovery. i have not heard from her since and i hope she is doing well. good luck to you
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