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Unread 09-23-2008, 02:15 PM   #1
Ali777
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Default Very new

Hi,

I've read many of the posts and I don't know what to say. I started drinking too much about 3-4 years ago. Wine, but beer or anything will do in a pinch. My family (small kids and a partner) I'm not sure really know how bad it is... but it doesn't seem to be as bad as the posts on this site.
I drink every day, I get drunk about 2-4 times a week. My guess is that I have 3-5 drinks a night (I know that's still a problem). I did also have a black out (scared the heck out of me) and seem to lose it with the kids if I need a drink. And the other night I hid an empty bottle of beer under the couch when my partner came down from putting the baby to bed - I just keep thinking about that.

Anyway - I decided a few months ago that I needed to stop - but it was harder than I thought and I would get grumpy with my kids so I would end up skipping a day but going back the next night. I decided to stop while I was over here so I wouldn't take it out on them but its hard.

Tonight's the second night without a drink. I know its always going to be difficult but when do the symptoms begin to stop? I'm so uptight I feel like I'm going to snap and I started crying for no reason.

Glad I found this place. I needed a place to go. Someday I'll have to explain to my family but I'd rather make some headway before I do.

Regards,
Ali777
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Unread 09-23-2008, 06:01 PM   #2
CarlyO
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Smile Welcome Ali 777

Hi Ali,

Welcome to the forum. Only you can say if you have a problem with alcohol, however there are signs that may make someone at least explore this issue further. I provided some links at the bottom of the page, one is a set a questions to at ask yourself.

It is often difficult imo to compare oneself to others because each person has a different " rock bottom" meaning for some it could be that alcohol interferes with relationships while others it may be a DUI/Jail. What is often suggested is look for the similarities in people's stories and identify with feelings. For example, you mentioned feeling like you were going to snap, felt like crying, this is actually common during the withdrawal phase. Some people describe it as mourning a loss, the loss of a "friend" . Or your emotions have been numbed for some time and now you are not dulling your emotions.

*** Please be careful of alcohol withdrawal - it is impossible and not advisable for anyone here to gauge when your withdrawal will stop. We can share experiences, but it is always recommended to seek professional help for withdrawal. Depending on how much, the frequency , age, prior health issues ....- it can cause serious physical symptoms and can even be fatal, which is why it should be monitored by a medical professional. Please be Careful and go to the ER ASAP if your symptoms get worse.

Maybe the reason you were grumpy when you stopped is because your body and mind was responding to Not having alcohol ? It is not easy to do this by yourself, have you considered a support group or counseling? Right now I am really concerned about your withdrawal, is there a doctor you could see to help you through this? You say you do not want to tell your family but is there someone you can trust to be with you during this time? There is always AA, most towns /cities have meetings 24 -7.

Please read the links I provided and there is also a lot of helpful info and links here as well. Please let us know how you are doing. THere is usually someone checking in - so if you need to vent - someone will be here. I hope you will check back in when you can, until then Ali , please take care of yourself.
Carly

Links....
Alcohol withdrawal
http://www.alcoholanswers.org/alcoho...withdrawal.cfm

Do I need help ?
http://www.alcoholanswers.org/alcoho...-need-help.cfm
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Important disclaimer: Any information in this post is not and does not constitute medical advice under any circumstances. Addiction Survivors, Inc. does not warranty or guarantee the accurateness, completeness, adequacy or currency of the information contained in or linked to the Site. Your use of information on the Site or materials linked to the Site is entirely at your own risk. NEVER take any online advice over that of a qualified healthcare provider. Any information contained on AddictionSurvivors.org should only serve to inspire further investigation with credible, verifiable references sources such as your physician or therapist.
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Unread 09-24-2008, 03:45 AM   #3
Ali777
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Default Day 2

Thanks for writing - this is a hard step. I'm now sure I have an issue. Last night I had sweats and couldn't really sleep.
Actually I'm on business in the UK (wanted to start not drinking while I was away from my kids). I'll keep an eye on the symptoms - I'm not shaking but do feel hot (and its not the beautiful UK weather!)

I give so much credit to those who quit who were drinking so much more than me...

Day 3 today.
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Unread 09-24-2008, 05:04 PM   #4
CarlyO
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HI Ali ,

Glad to hear from you and that you are doing ok. This is not intended as medical advice - but there are what are called comfort meds that help people get through mild withdrawal, withdrawal that is NOT life threatening. Again, it depends on how much you were drinking and for how long. Comfort meds can be anything from mild anti-anxiety meds ( rxed by a doctor ) to something like benadryl to help you sleep as night. Maybe you could speak to a pharmacist over there and see what they recommend. Just remember to get help asap, if you need to.

Congrats on Day 3 ! I know it can't be easy doing this by yourself, are you certain your partner would not be understanding ? IMO - our loved ones just want us to be healthy and happy and will support our efforts as it benefits everyone. Just something to think about. This is definitely a process, please hang in there, we are here if you need to vent. Again, congrats and esp. not drinking with all of those Pubs on every corner - Kudos to you !
Take care, Carly
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Important disclaimer: Any information in this post is not and does not constitute medical advice under any circumstances. Addiction Survivors, Inc. does not warranty or guarantee the accurateness, completeness, adequacy or currency of the information contained in or linked to the Site. Your use of information on the Site or materials linked to the Site is entirely at your own risk. NEVER take any online advice over that of a qualified healthcare provider. Any information contained on AddictionSurvivors.org should only serve to inspire further investigation with credible, verifiable references sources such as your physician or therapist.
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Unread 09-25-2008, 10:59 AM   #5
Ali777
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Default Day 4

Hi and thanks for being there. Apparently I am an alcoholic (very hard to write). I just thought I had a habit, don't know why I thought there was a difference. My sleeping is all messed up - the weird thing is I feel very awake. I keep sweating. And drinking water like I'm a fish - what's upwith that... I mean 2 liters last night.

If I think I'll never drink again I seem to get some kind of panic attack - so THANK YOU so much for writing the "take it one day", "one minute" at a time. Now I just say - "I'm not going to drink at lunch" and that I can seem to handle. I took the group out to dinner last night and thought I'd feel really weird and everyone would ask why I wasn't drinking, but no one seemed to notice. Then I noticied only half of the people had drinks... I had always thought everyone got a drink. Weird,

I had been reading some posts a few days before I posted and I understand the person that said "You'd never guess it was me" I think a lot of people would be surprised about me. Four young kids, successful etc. I feel like such a loser right now, such a jerk - how did I let it get this bad?

Anyway, I fly back home tomorrow. I have to deal with alcohol being in the house and visitors coming in for the weekend who like to drink. Already know I'm going to say I don't want to drink due to this cold (which I luckly have). I figure my partner is going to ask sometime in the next week because I always have a drink when I get home from work (I know - how did I not know I had a problem).

I hope my kids see a difference in me - I lvoe them so much.

Thanks for being there this week - I don't know if you realize how much its meant.

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Unread 09-25-2008, 09:26 PM   #6
CarlyO
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Hi Ali,

First of all you are not a loser, alcoholism is a disease of the mind, body and spirit. It does not discriminate and it has NOTHING to do with will power or how successful you may be. If you were to walk into a 12 step group, out patient group, you would see every type of person there, from soccer Moms to CEOs. It sounds like you recognized you had a problem before any major negative consequences ocurred and are taking steps to change your life. This is Huge and Congratulations on doing this !!

I am glad you are making it through the withdrawals, yes, use the excuse of the cold to give your body more time to adjust to living without alcohol in your system. I have to say it - if you feel bad - get help asap, ok ? I know I say it over and over but alcohol withdrawal can be extremely dangerous.

You have already come a Loong , you have a great attitude, I hope that it will get you through any rough patches you may encounter.
You are spot on about taking it a day or moment at a time, it does get easier with practice and with time.

You may still be moody, overly sensitive, be patient with yourself. I do worry about you going through this all alone. Have you considered some form of support? Counseling? AA or other 12 step programs , something? Or maybe at least read Recovery material, books or online material may help.

Also be aware that often when you stop alcohol, or any substance, there is a void that people experience. This void needs to be filled with something positive/ healthy/fun - something to keep your mind off of drinking. Just wanted to throw that out there for consideration.

Allright Ali ! have a safe trip home and I hope all goes well when you return, please keep us posted when you can. Take care, hang in there and CONGRATS ! Carly
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Important disclaimer: Any information in this post is not and does not constitute medical advice under any circumstances. Addiction Survivors, Inc. does not warranty or guarantee the accurateness, completeness, adequacy or currency of the information contained in or linked to the Site. Your use of information on the Site or materials linked to the Site is entirely at your own risk. NEVER take any online advice over that of a qualified healthcare provider. Any information contained on AddictionSurvivors.org should only serve to inspire further investigation with credible, verifiable references sources such as your physician or therapist.
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Unread 10-03-2008, 08:47 PM   #7
jerryg
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Ali,
I am glad to hear of your efforts. I hope you weather the symptoms and stay sober. But you stand a better chance of success if you do this with professional guidance.
see you doctor soon.
Please look into it, I am sure it be handled discreetly.
If you are in social situations, you don't have to make excuse for not drinking. Just don't drink. If someone asks if you why, just casually say, "I don't feel like it."
Don't make it into a big deal. No one is going to make you drink.

Again, see you doctor.
Do your best,
Jerry
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Important disclaimer: Any information in this post is not and does not constitute medical advice under any circumstances. Addiction Survivors, Inc. does not warranty or guarantee the accurateness, completeness, adequacy or currency of the information contained in or linked to the Site. Your use of information on the Site or materials linked to the Site is entirely at your own risk. NEVER take any online advice over that of a qualified healthcare provider. Any information contained on AddictionSurvivors.org should only serve to inspire further investigation with credible, verifiable references sources such as your physician or therapist.
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Unread 10-14-2008, 01:32 PM   #8
JaneDoe
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Ali777, you don't have to do this alone. Look into the vivitrol shot. Nope, I don't get a commission. LOL I just believe in it. I've not drank in 10 months. Had the shot for 3 and got my stuff together with counseling.

http://www.addictionsurvivors.org/vb...ad.php?t=18957

Makes you not even care about drinking. People did ask me 'JaneDoe, why aren't you drinking' and I'd tells them that I just don't feel like it. They got used to it. Some stopped too. It don't matter what anyone around you thinks. It's about YOU.

I hope that you're feeling better. Sounds like you had some alcohol withdrawals going on there. Potassium is good too. Alcohol depletes that.

I'll keep checking back.

JaneDoe
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