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Unread 09-29-2008, 10:49 PM   #1
mswkickboxing
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Default Having a hard time asking for help as a clinician

Well, I am brand new to this forum. I hope I am posting this in the correct place. It's hard for me to come to the realization that I am an alcoholic. To make it even worse I'm a substance abuse counselor in a residential facility. I'm a hypocrite! It's hard to ask for help in the area and it is so taboo. For some reason I have an easier time saying I've been clean from drugs for 7 years but yet alcoholic, can't even say the words or tell anyone. My family knows, everyone knows because I am a drunk dialer. I always claim it is my medication. I know no onw believes it, but I go to great lengths to try and make them. I've tried AA meetings in the past and haven't really felt all that comfortable at them. In addition the residents go to them and I never know what ones they are going to be at.

I'm tired and most embarrassed about my DDing. I feel stupid the next day and have to check my cell phone as to who I called. I'm hurting my family and that is killing me. I am afraid to leave my house, so instead to pass the time, I drink. I don't have any friends really and am pretty much a loner (not by choice). Don't know where to go from here. Any suggestions would be greatfully appreciated.
Myra
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Unread 09-29-2008, 10:50 PM   #2
mswkickboxing
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Default Live Chats

Are there any live chats on line anywhere besides forums?
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Unread 09-30-2008, 12:10 AM   #3
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Default Hi and welcome Mswkickboxing !

Hi Myra,

I am so glad you found this forum. To answer your question about chat on this forum, no not now, maybe down the road.

Congrats on stopping your doc for so many years! As far as the alcohol - imo , What you are going through is not uncommon - because of burn out, not being vigilante about recovery, and people in the helping profession have such a hard time asking for help themselves. I understand not wanting to go to meetings because you probably would not feel like you could talk freely. But we all need to people, maybe your drinking is what is keeping you at home and from getting out and being with people ?

Have you thought about seeing a professional one on one ? Myra - You are NOT the first to work in the field and this happen to, even though you may feel like you are. I can tell you I have known people in your situation and the best thing imo that you can do is get help asap or else the guilt and lonliness will eat you up.
As far as the DD, it happens. Back in the day, I had my share of waking up and not knowing what I said the night before. It is a sick feeling!

Are you concerned about your job ? - most treatment facilities are understanding and will help an employee to get back on track. You survived getting off of drugs - I know with help, you can stop the alcohol. The rest will fall into place once you get help. Lonliness is the worst - but you can change that. I believe it - I really do.

New people are signing on the forum every day - so maybe one day we will have chat like the other ( Bupe ) forum has : )

Please keep us posted on how you are doing, hang in there Myra and take care, Carly
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Unread 09-30-2008, 06:51 PM   #4
mswkickboxing
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Carly,

Thanks for replying. I actually found out about this website because I got a postcard in my work mailbox. Who do you send these to? Is it a random list of places? When I got the card in my box it was meant for the residents, but I know so many of our staff who could benefit from something like this and their in the same boat as I am, but none of us will admit it because people do not hold co-worker confidentiality very high on their list.

I am afraid about my job. I think they are convinced it is the meds but I'm not sure. I definately know that people at work view me differently from DD. I don't think I have the rapport like I used to with my co-workers. But the hard part is that I did drink with one of them one night. He made me swear that I wouldn't tell anyone. I didn't tell anyone, and now he is switching a variety of different situations around to make me look bad and say I'm an alcoholic. Yes it is true but I can't admit it because I'm not in recovery. Drugs I can because I am in recovery. One of the staff members that was there for years relapsed. He started not showing up for work etc. When they found out he relapsed, they fired him, didn't try to help him. No one even knows that this co-worker and I ever got together one night outside of work. My job is very toxic. The people in it are narccistic, manipulative and have no conscience (not all of them, but a good portion.) Today I had my first guy graduate on my caseload successfully. I felt so much like a hypocrite as he sat and told me the reason he made it through the program was because of me and would probably be back behind bars because he didn't graduate. His mother bought me a beautiful boutque of flowers and also said, "Thank you for giving me my son back." My thoughts after were, how about going to get a box of wine and celebrate. I didn't, but I was darn close.

I know why I drink. I drink because I am scared of going out at night time so I don't socialize with people. I don't have any one that visits me, not even my own parents. I lost all my friends three years ago. I was the passenger in a car accident and just went back to work Feburary of this year. The accident was 9/17/05. I was in a wheel chair at times, had a HHA, used forearm braced crutches and an orthotic. I was home so I drank to make the time pass by and because I like the taste. In June of this year I was fixed with a brand new appliance called the walk aide, medical breakthrough. Somewhere in my brain, it forgot my left leg was still there. So this machine straps around my legs where the nerves are to resend signals to my brain to pick my foot up and walk. The disconnect came somewhere in the spinal damage I had. This machine is amazing. I am the first person they have had this success with so I have met all sorts of different people, creator, manufacturer etc. They actually did a news piece on me and the machine if you are interested that I can send you. Now I continue to drink because it blocks out the pain after a long day of work. It just makes me pass out with the exception of the drunken calls first. I still can't kickbox, play sports, swim without assistance or do martial arts. I always dealt with stress by working out and now I can't. I need a new outlet and haven't quite found one. A year after the accident I tried an outpatient program which I enjoyed. They discharged me because they said it was more mental health (PTSD). I tried another program and they wouldn't even except me past the screening. I do go to counseling now, however I see a psychiatrist who actually does meds and therapy on a weekly basis. She knows that I'm an alcoholic and used to prescribe campral for me. She has told me though that if alcoholism is my main problem she will refer me to someone else. She gets paid through the New York State Crime Victim's board and most people do not accept this or want to deal with it. I have an appointment on Monday with her and I'm thinking about telling her I messed up really bad and need to go back on campral or another med like it. She does know this is a time of two very tragic anniversaries and my birthday which is a difficult time for me. Maybe getting back on campral again or another one might help. Do you know of any besides campral that have been used? At my job we don't use these medications because the kids have so much support and they have already for the most part detoxed and they can talk through the feelings of wanting to drink with a staff member, in groups or at an NA or AA meeting.

Loneliness is hard. My job is so terrible right now I've had three interviews in the last week and am trying to relocate. I think I need a new beginning. Besides I want to be closer to my family in RI. I've been in upstate NY my whole life besides when I went to college. I think change is a good idea. If it doesn't work out I can always move back, my parents are in the area. Maybe I'd feel more comfortable going to meetings because no one would know me. A few times in my area, I went to a meeting and a person was there that I had removed their children from the home. Or programs would show up with kids that I was actively treating which is a boundaries issue.

Sorry I am going in circles with this email. It is just a complicated situation all around (I am sure for many others as well.) I just need to come up with a way to get me through until my appointment.

I will definately check the links out. Thank you
Thank you again for responding to me, I appreciate it.
Sorry for the long winded post.
Myra
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Unread 10-01-2008, 12:07 AM   #5
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Hi Myra, I am gathering some info on one of your questions about Mecication assisted Tx. Can you tell us what happened when you tried Camprol, it would really help others who are considering MAT. I will talk with someone tomorrow to find out more that I may have missed.
I will be right back to post to about your other concerns -Carly

Vivitrol Link ....

http://www.alcoholanswers.org/treatm...-treatment.cfm
Below is a post from JaneDoe and her experience with vivitrol .

SunnySideUp, you're doing the right thing by reaching out now. Don't end up like I was.

http://www.addictionsurvivors.org/vb...ad.php?t=18957
http://www.addictionsurvivors.org/vb...ad.php?t=19103
http://www.addictionsurvivors.org/vb...ad.php?t=19104

I'm good now because I made that decision to get help once and for all. I got this vivitrol shot. It lasts a month and it takes the pleasure out of drinking so you don't care if you do or you don't. There's some info here.
http://www.alcoholanswers.org/treatm...-treatment.cfm

Maybe try that or the naltrexone pill.

I didn't do AA, but did take it one day at a time, just say you won't drink today. Those days turn into weeks and months and then a year. I don't miss it. I bet you won't either.

JaneDoe
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Unread 10-01-2008, 01:18 AM   #6
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Hi Myra,

Thank you for sharing your amazing story, you have a lot to be proud of and I am glad you happened to get the postcard with the forum address. We are a fairly young forum. New people are joining everyday. I like it because it is easy to navigate, it has so much great info and links, and people really care here.

You have survived so much, you are a survivor, I believe once you figure out a plan, you will succeed. When you stopped drugs 7 years ago - how did you do it, I think I assumed you were involved in a 12 step group.

I see that you are in a tough place because of your job and not being able to attend meetings because the groups from the facility also attend them.
Do you live in a small town, are there any meetings you could attend where you would not run into people you know? What about NA, or another type of support group , if only for the fellowship for now?
Being alone stinks, I know it does and you sound like you want to have friends, but you just need to figure a way around the obstacles in your way.

Do you think your job is in jeopardy? I thought that employers had to offer assistance through your Employee Assistance Program, EAP? Maybe there was more to that employees situation that was fired? Check and see what your rights are, if you have an EAP program.
I know it is scary to change jobs, esp in this economy but you mentioned you were looking. Are you looking for a job, not related to drug and alcohol treatment? At least until you get yourself sorted out. Maybe that would allow you to get back into meetings, if that is what you want. I know you know of the fellowship that any of the support groups offer, that is a great way to beat loneliness, make friends, and a great tool for recovery. You say you are afraid to go out at night, but what do you do on the weekends? What about a book club, or volunteer at a hospital - you have so much to offer, maybe search the paper for something that interests you.
I know you are thinking yeah right , I help people all day long, why do I want to volunteer someplace? IMO, it may be a better environment, you would meet people out of work and it could lead to a new and better job.

I will keep thinking of ideas and I am sure some other people will be by to post as well. Hang in there and I congrats on your client that graduated ! I know how you feel inside, but it still does not mean you did not have a positive impact on his life and you sound like a darn good counselor !

Take care Myra, Carly
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Unread 10-01-2008, 07:50 PM   #7
mswkickboxing
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Thanks Carly for responding.

To answer your question about the drugs. I didn't use AA or NA. I stopped because I realized that marijuana was improving my academic performance considerably. Yes I really did say improve. In high school I had b's and C's. When I went for my associates first semester I got hooked on pot and how well I was doing in school. People told me my grades would decline, they didn't. When I made the decision for my BSW I had some psycholigcal testing done. I was off the charts ADHD. Started Adderal and realized I didn't need to smoke anymore. I missed the act of smoking which I did struggle with. I just smoked more cigarettes and that took care of it. X I stopped because I was afrad of legal problems that I was already close to when I would pick up pot. I got paranoid, I also just wanted to be off drugs which would lead into something else. Alcohol I continued because it was part of college, and it was legal. I also could work out and do the things I loved so I was occupied with other stuff.

I'm at the point of so much embarrassment, tired of lying, feeling crappy. I stop for a day or two and then I get clammy, heart racing, irritable and hot flashes. I'm just done. I had stopped when I started my job. I had 54 days clean and then my sponsor said she wanted to no more contact with me. So I picked up again. She wasn't through AA or anything just someone who had a lot of clean time and acted like a mentor. I knew her but not friends with her so she could be pretty open and honest with me. She was SO helpful.

My job, the people are dirty. They are systemattically firing people so that it doesn't look like lay-offs. But they are waiting for people to make the smallest error and are documenting everything we do and then using it against us as "look at all these mistakes." I've seen 6 of these in the past two months. My job makes me paranoid.

Weekends I get drunk. Starting Friday night until Sunday. I wake up from passing out and then continue to drink. I may go to my parents to do laundry, run errands and grocery shop. My trips are quick there so I can get home to drink. I'm also on a medication that they told me if I drink I'd get drunk quicker, I thought what a money saver. Terrible thought but totally true.

Thanks on the grad part. It does feel pretty good. Wish I had more clean time than my own client. Maybe next one I will.

Hope you are doing well
Myra
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Unread 10-01-2008, 07:54 PM   #8
mswkickboxing
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JaneDoe,

I think I've been on campral for so long it isn't working. I still want to drink on it. Hasn't taken away the pleasure for me. Perhaps I'm not take it as regularly as I should. I miss a dose a day sometimes. Usually I'm pretty good, but that may be why I feel like I want to drink.

Not sure
Myra
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Unread 10-01-2008, 08:57 PM   #9
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Hi Myra,

I am still researching the MAT , and wondering why the Campral is not working. Sorry to bombard you with questions last night, I read my post today and thought she must have felt part of the Inquisition : )

It does sound like your job is not as secure as I had hoped for you. It has got to add more stress to an already stressful situation for you, do you have a back up plan, just in case?
If you are drinking daily then you know the dangers of stopping cold turkey. Is going inpatient a possibility, just get away for a while and work on you ?

Myra , maybe at this point you can start thinking about what you want to do and make a plan. I will be back in a few minutes to see if you are online.

How is the NOT DD going ? ; ) BRB- Carly
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Unread 10-01-2008, 09:32 PM   #10
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Hi agian,

I sent some info about the Campral to someone who may know more, I will post what I find out .
So you have your appointment next Monday? Hang in there until then. I will make sure I am online tomorrow around 7pm since that looks like a good time for you. Please take care of yourself Myra, you can get through this and have the life that you want. Carly
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Unread 10-02-2008, 12:44 AM   #11
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Myra,
The suggestion to consider Vivitrol is a good idea. But clearly you are going to have to deal with the stress of your job. Did you enter the field after recovery?

And yet you have faced some serious losses in your life. Your drinking hampers that process. Treatment for the addiction must be maintained, some sort of conscious recovery routine as you work on the PTSD issues. It sounds like you need to be careful with detoxing from alcohol on your own. Talk with your doctor about it. It's a serious matter.
And it doesn't matter what the substance is, if you use it in an addictive manner it's all the same.
Very complex stuff you face. But you need to stop drinking. Look into the Vivitrol.

All the best,
Jerry
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Unread 10-02-2008, 07:38 PM   #12
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Hi Myra,

I wanted to check and see if you are online now and how you are doing. I guess everyone is going to be watching the big debate tonight at 9pm.

I am so glad JerryG Posted to you, he always has such good feedback.

Ok, I will be here for a while. I hope all is well with you. Take care, Carly
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Unread 10-02-2008, 10:18 PM   #13
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Well I totally screwed up tonight. As this being an anniveresary, although my b-day. I did what I should not have done and drank. In addition, truth in a bottle came out about the dangerous position I'm in with my boyfriend and trying to get out of state. My aunt and my sister (both who live outside of NY) called my parents. I got a call from her after I had been drinking saying that my parents were on the way to come and get me. I was packing my car, dog and all. Had a pushing match with my father to get into my car. My mother and father got me into their car, and my dad drove off in my car to their home. They took me to urgent care and gave me ativan which I'm already on they so wouldn't fill for one night at the pharmacy sp I have none. I flipped because tonight is my b-day and supposed to go out with my boyfriend who is abusive. I knew he would be mad I was late etc. People ask for the truth and they can't deal with it. Don't try doing interventions you can't handle. They should have left me at my apartment, never came and let me deal with what was going to happen. Instead I have to deal with him tomorrow, everyone in my family is mad at me and I don't trust anyone. One thing the DV said was don't trust anyone not even your family they can place you more at risk than you know even know they though they are trying to care. I can't face my apartment alone tomorrow. I have no choice but it will be hard. Until I get out of state, things will not be any easier. My plan was to float by and not say anything until everything thing is planned and I'm on the road. My family got involved tonight and made things so much worse. I didn't make dinner like I was supposed to, basically no showed. My parents took my cell which he will be trying to call me on and won't get me. Yes I messed up when i had a drink. However, things would have never been this awful had it not been for my parents not taking my cell and them taking me away from my apartment and car (all which I pay for.) I'm scared. I admitted to my sister I'm scared and this is how it all happened. I know I'm going in circles, but I don't know what to do.

Yup I screwed up ROYALLY

Any advice, and sorry I messed up.
My

PS Sorry for the typos, my mother doesn't have internet download on this
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Unread 10-02-2008, 11:30 PM   #14
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Myra, I am not clear on what event happened , your birthday or anniversary, but I am so sorry that you are going through this. You mentioned you are in a dangerous situation with your BF , are you safe?
I am not sure I understand what all happened. I may be completely off the mark, but it sounds like you spoke with your family on the phone tonight and they did some type of an intervention?

Myra, I hope things will be clearer for you tomorrow and that you will consider getting help asap. It sounds like you have been doing this your way and it is not working. You seem like you are a very intelligent person, you know the answers, you know that can be an obstacle to recovery, esp. when you work in the field.
It comes down to making the decision of what you want for your life.
The choice is yours.
Please be safe and take care, Carly
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Unread 10-03-2008, 04:47 PM   #15
mswkickboxing
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Carly,

Yes they definately did an intervention. It was my birthday yesterday which I hate. This is a difficult time of year and I thought I was going to make it without drinking and I was dead wrong. Waking up at my parents this morning and having to face them was really hard. You are absoltely correct, what I'm doing isn't working. I think I need to be flat out honest with my counselor as to what is going on. I'm absolteuly miserable and I need to do something about it. After last night I am pretty positive that moving is the best option right now. I feel very secluded as to where I can get help. It is hard working in this field, people talk. They say all this stuff about confidentiality, and they don't keep it. It's really bad.

Thanks again for your help. I'm going to think about what you said in that what I am doing is not working.
Have a good evening
Myra
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Unread 10-03-2008, 08:36 PM   #16
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Myra,

What you describe sounds like a real mess. This was not a pleasant by what you describe. And on your birthday of all days.
Sorry to hear you had to go through it. It is such a painful story.
I am sure it was painful for all involved. You are now aware of how far reaching your drinking is affecting those in your life.

All I can add, is that it is, what it is. An intervention!
And the message is clear that you take this painful opportunity and fully engage some serious, committed treatment.
What do you need to do, that you don't want to do?

And it sounds like having an abusive boyfriend doesn't help things either.

Could it be time to ask for help and perform a serious inventory?

Take care,
Jerry
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Unread 10-03-2008, 09:05 PM   #17
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Hi Myra,

I was writing this while Jerry posted, which is good feedback as always.
To add ,,,
IMO- being honest with your counselor is vital to finding a plan to get you out of this. I am still concerned about your safety in regards to BF - are you safe? BTW- When you say move, would you be moving closer to him or away from him ?

I can imagine it was difficult facing your family today, but I am guessing they are worried and want to help but do not know what to do. I can imagine they are scared.
What is the possibility or your interest in going to a detox and have time just to work on your issues? Or at least intensive out patient after medical detox?
Imo- You cannot move forward and live a happy healthy life ( whicjh you deserve,btw ) until you face your issues. Myra, it will be so worth it, you see people struggle with this everyday at work, you know the outcomes if people do not get professional help.

You do not have to live this way, alcohol will not solve anything, it just puts you in limbo, temporarily suspends the inevitable, but at grave danger to your life. It is not worth the risk, believe me I know.

I think you said your appointment is Monday. In the meantime, do something positive, read the posts here, and even on the opiate recovery side may give you inspiration and hope you need to make the first step. Please seriously think of what you want your life to be and get help to make it a reality !
Please stay safe and take care, Carly
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Unread 10-05-2008, 07:01 PM   #18
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Hi Myra, just checking on you, I hope everything is ok. Let us know how you are doing when you have a chance. Take care, Carly
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Unread 10-06-2008, 07:20 PM   #19
mswkickboxing
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Default To Carly and JerryG

Hello therre!
To Casrly and JerryG

I haven't been on in the last couple of days as I have been trying to recoup emotionally from Thursday evening. When I woke up at my parents home Fri, I apologized to my father. He said to me, you need help. I said yes I do. He said we'd talk about it later as I needed to get to my apartment to change for work. I kinda went through the motions of the day. I called my aunt and apologized for calling her. After work I called my sister. She was not mean to me at all about my behavior (which for her is surprising). I just listened to her say to me that she gets to a point where she is ready to trust me again and then something like this happens and it takes longer to trust the me again. She said that she doesn't want me to move to RI anymore (which is where she lives). She also said that her and her husband both feel that I am not stable enough to be alone with the baby ( my niece- 3 mons). She said it doesn't mean that I can't hold her or spend time with her, it would have to be when they are around.

Saturday when she was at my parents (she came in from RI), she said she was proud of the way I handled the problem and reconized how hard it was for me to call the people I hurt and apologized to them. I originally wasn't going to my parents house and was going to avoid that they were here. I told her I was embarrassed and uncomfortable. She said it would be better to get the uncomfortable part over sooner than later. So I went and she was sweet about everything, but it was still uncomfortable. For my birthday she got me a gift certificate to a high end spa, to alleviate stress and have a relaxing day. Before she left she said, because of the way I took ownership and stepped up (which I usually don't and let time pass); she is still in favor of me moving to RI and sorry she said that the day before, but she was upset. I can understand why. Sunday my parents had another sit down with me. Their grilling made it really hard. I said I was sorry, couldn't change the past and the were upset about my bf. My father is changing my locks to my apartment. They are happy I finally was honest about what was happening with him. They know every year I have a serious melt down on my birthday. Between my birthday, anniversary of an assult and my boyfriend it was enough to make anyone have a break down. My parents know about the DV now. They know that moving from him is a good idea, I'll be over three hours away.

I made it to my appointment today and haven't drank since Thursday. I started myself back on the campral Friday AM and agreed to take it and not skip any doses with my therapist. Thanksfully I never threw out the bottle. My therapist is also in agreement for me to move and that it would be beneficial. She said if it doesn't work, than I can always pack up my stuff in a truck and come back the same way I went.

The biggest thing for me was the possibility of not have a relationship with my niece and losing my family. It hurt me to see how much I hurt them and they are tired of picking up after me. Although these break downs are once a year, they are very scary. The drunk calls they deal with, their tired of. My therapist suggested writing myself a letter about Thursday and how I felt over the weekend and how I affected those that I love. She said when I feel like going to the liquor store, take it out and read it. Physically I feel okay. I am not clammy anymore, or as agiatated. Today I was pretty productive at work and more focused. It helps when I'm not spending half my day recovering from a hangover. The shakes have stopped and I think I'm through the worst part. I really am feeling pretty good. Saturday I did go to urgenct care, had a physical, had them check my bp etc.

So that is where I am at right now. I just need to stay on track, take the medication, and continue to step it up in sessions she said. I don't think I was completely trying as hard as I could of. When my father reminded me that I tried to get in a car intoxicated was a very scary thought. If I had done it and especially hurt someone, I would never be able to forgive myself.

Do you have any suggestions for good books to read? I have lots of daily affirmation books but anything that has been helpful for you?

Thanks for checking in on me, I appreciate it
Myra
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Unread 10-06-2008, 09:19 PM   #20
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Hi Myra,

Good to hear from you, that you are ok and spoke with your family about everything so openly and earnestly.
Also, Congrats on not drinking since Thurs. !
Please be careful with withdrawals. How do you manage it alone? I have to say this even though I know you work in the field, but be careful- Please go to the ER /doctor if you experience any withdrawals. Withdrawals can be life threatening.

Myra it seems like you are dealing with many issues. PTSD, breaking up with a BF who you mentioned was abusive, stress at work. I think increasing your counseling is a great idea, Jerry mentioned" serious committed treatment," I agree with him.
With hard work, you can have the life you want and deserve ! It sounds like this is what you want.

Do you have a time frame for moving? Are you safe until then?

Also, The link that I gave you to the support groups - does any of it interest you? Even doing one online ( I will post the links for them) . But bottom line, we all need a healthy connection with others and being alone , you mentioned was a trigger for you.

How are your parents doing with this, do they have support for themselves? I would imagine they were sick with worry.

I am sure I am not posting anything you do not already know - logically, intellectually, we can know what we need to do, especially for others but applying it to ourselves can be another story entirely. That is where counseling and support is so vital.

Well, I hope you take advantage of your birthday massage - this would be a great week to get one, yes? I will post some links and books later.

Take care Myra, glad this weekend is behind you and now you can look forward to positive changes in your life. Take care, Carly
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Unread 10-06-2008, 11:00 PM   #21
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Myra,

It's good to read your post.
You're family is being frank with you. That's good.
They sound very kind, and are willing to help. That is great.
And yet it is very humbling to have them intervene in your life.
Well, that humility coupled with honesty and a load of patience will go a long way towards you staying sober. Watch your mood, be mindful of the irritabilty and the impulse to resist care. You are not perfect and you will struggle. The struggle is a sign you are learning, and you can sit with the lessons.
Beware of the "F@#k it" line of thinking, even in the slightest.
Stay sober.
All the best,
Jerry
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Unread 10-08-2008, 10:19 PM   #22
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Hi Myra,
Just checking on you. I hope everything is going well, hang in there - you can do this !
Take care, Carly
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Unread 10-08-2008, 10:51 PM   #23
mswkickboxing
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Hey Carly,

Made it another day!

Hope all is well with you! :-)
Myra
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Unread 10-09-2008, 05:23 PM   #24
jerryg
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Myra,

It's good to hear from you.
Feel free to post some details of your situation.
Carry on in sobriety.
Jerry
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Unread 10-09-2008, 10:38 PM   #25
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Hi Myra,

Glad you checked in, Ok here comes 20 questions : ) ! how are you handling everything ? You had your locks changed right? What are you doing to fill your down time after work?
I hope everything is going well.
Have you stepped up counseling or started other support? You have a lot to deal with, you did not get this way overnight so the issues will take time to sort out. You can do this, it takes work, but you can do it ! Take care Myra , Carly

PS Thanks for asking about me, I am doing fine, staying busy, but busy is good for me.
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Last edited by CarlyO; 10-09-2008 at 10:41 PM.. Reason: added
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Unread 10-13-2008, 06:15 AM   #26
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Default HI Myra , How are you doing ?

Hi Myra,

How is everything going? I have been away, but wanted to check and see how you were doing. Give us and update when you can , take Care Carly : )
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Unread 10-14-2008, 01:39 PM   #27
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Quote:
Originally Posted by mswkickboxing View Post
JaneDoe,

I think I've been on campral for so long it isn't working. I still want to drink on it. Hasn't taken away the pleasure for me. Perhaps I'm not take it as regularly as I should. I miss a dose a day sometimes. Usually I'm pretty good, but that may be why I feel like I want to drink.

Not sure
Myra
Myra, it's not gonna work if you don't take it. That's why I got the vivitrol shot. I'd stop taking pills if I felt like getting trashed. The shot is for a month. Really worked along with counseling. Are you taking your campral now? I never tried that one. Figured if the naltrexone pills didn't work, neither would all those campral pills.

You got to do what's going to work for you. Make you feel better. Keep trying, it's worth it.

JaneDoe
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Unread 10-17-2008, 05:45 PM   #28
CarlyO
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Hi Myra,

Just checking in with you, hope all is going well ! Carly
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Unread 10-22-2008, 10:52 AM   #29
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Myra, how you doing? Post when you can.

JaneDoe
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