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Unread 02-28-2016, 12:00 PM   #51
Tryntryagain
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No.....>>>>>> Thank YOU dear R Lee.

There is no finer line in cinema history than in "The Philadelphia Story".

The stunningly eclectic, and quite astoundingly beautiful Lauren Bacall says...........

"You know how to whistle....don't you? You put your lips together and blow"

You have taught me how to put my lips together and speak.

My dearest R Lee. Thank you.

Be peaceful, be healthy and be strong. Loveness to you my dearest R Lee.
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Unread 03-02-2016, 06:04 PM   #52
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Good evening my dear R Lee. Broght blessings to you.

Well here we are. Exactly 10pm on Wednesday night in a very cold dear ole Blighty. I am now ready for my bed, and as you lovingly asked this morning "do i find a sober birthday boy today".......yes my dear R Lee......moreover.....you find one tonight.

I had a wonderful session with Milan this evening, a real heartfelt, yet gentle session. My sobriety empowered that. In a big way, you had a hand in empowering me to have that sobriety.

Thank you so much my dear friend.

Be peaceful, be healthy and be strong. Loveness to you my dear R Lee.
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Unread 03-03-2016, 10:35 AM   #53
R. Lee
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Stay strong friend. Have a great day.
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Unread 03-03-2016, 05:57 PM   #54
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Hi Everyone. About a month or so I responded to Tryn saying I was amazed the he might feel something was going on in my life. Well I opened a can of worms thinking that I was getting to much attention for something that might not even happen.

Well as I suspected my better half Cindy my 1st & 3rd wife who I have been divorced from since 1989 has chosen to move to FL. We have been living together for about 16 years. When I accepted her back into my life I made a commitment to her saying I could never be able to get married again but I would never ask her to leave.

Over the last 11 years I have learned to accept situations no matter how much I disagree. Cindy left this A.M. I feel bad but I am OK & will continue to work at staying sober just for today. Funny the thought of a drink has not crossed my mind, but I will be aware that urge could come at any moment & I have a plan to deal with it if it comes.

This is a new chapter in my crazy life. I am somewhat afraid about going on alone but it is what it is.

Thanks for all your love & support. Love R. Lee
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Unread 03-03-2016, 06:10 PM   #55
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R Lee im really sorry to hear that, funny how i just think you are this great strong, thoughtful, man, but of course you need a cuddle now and again too.

Ill be thinking of you like always and know you are never alone with all of us by your side.

Love to you, and thanks for sharing xxx
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Unread 03-03-2016, 06:43 PM   #56
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I'm so sorry, R.Lee. Keep an open heart, and you never know what's around the corner.

Much love to you.
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Unread 03-03-2016, 10:28 PM   #57
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Hey RLee,

No matter how "right" events might be, whether or not they're "for the best," or any other goofball cliché, separation from a person one knows so well, and for so long, is almost always a painful, gut-wrenching experience.

Other words, even when it's the "right thing," (IF it's the right thing), even when it is exactly what YOU want, it is a huge damn change and, in some way, just FEELS crazy. More than crazy, sometimes.

All that to say, I'm sorry that this thing, for whatever reason, is happening to you. I've come to like you a lot, come to care about your feelings.....and when I know your feelings are hurting, I feel, well---I feel damn saddened.

Crazy deal, RLee.

But then, you have weathered all kinds of crappy deals in your long life.....and you will endure this one. You will! I mean, really, who knows what tomorrow will bring?

Your job now, best thing you can do, is to put one foot in front of the other and move forward, move forward and do the next best thing you can do.

But still...crappy situation. Sorry.

I wish for you the best, RLee.

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Unread 03-03-2016, 11:09 PM   #58
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Big hug with lots of luv , lots of it for you.
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Unread 03-04-2016, 05:23 AM   #59
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RLee,
I'm not sure why Cindy decided to leave but no, you're not ok. I know you will feel her loss in your life. Your friend, your confidant, your love will not be there every day. No you are not 'ok'. You may not drink over this but you will feel her loss. I feel your loss. I feel some of your pain..

I love you RLee.
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Unread 03-04-2016, 06:10 AM   #60
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Good morning my dear R Lee. Bright blessings to you.

You have been a tower of strength in my life, and those of my brothers and sisters. Along with my dear Saint, you may well indeed be that tower of strength, yet you are also human dear friend. Being human simply means that at times on our journeys we can not help how we feel. However wise, however strong. Grief, loss and empty spaces can seem unfillable and unmanageable. The world seems at times to be a swirl of questions that have no answers. There are no words inside a person who has lost their love, and there are few words of comfort for those who love you... to find.

Your wisdom has already come to your aid in sharing, and also in having a plan should the deviant that alcohol is....try it on with you......just for today.

My dear R Lee, for sure another chapter in your crazy life, yet please my dearest brother, i love you, i feel so dreadfully deeply for you. If a hug was a leaf, i have a forest for you.

Be peaceful, be healthy and be strong. Loveness to you my dear, dear R Lee.
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Unread 03-04-2016, 11:14 AM   #61
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Thanks everyone. You all mean so much to me. Love, R. Lee
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Unread 03-04-2016, 11:18 AM   #62
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thinking of you R Lee xx
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Unread 03-04-2016, 04:32 PM   #63
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I hope you have a nice day today, thinking of you.
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Unread 03-04-2016, 10:40 PM   #64
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RLee, I do understand loss. Not all loss is through death. That doesn't mean it doesn't hurt. I wish we could go to Nan's for coffee, all of us, and debrief!
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Unread 03-04-2016, 11:33 PM   #65
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Thanks everyone again. I have found an inner strength to deal with this that I have never had before. I'm good to go another 24 hrs.
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Unread 03-05-2016, 06:09 AM   #66
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Good morning my dear R Lee. Bright blessings to you.

The wording of your last letter, the words you chose resonate with me to the point that when i read it i lept off chair and shouted out..."THATS IT!".

When i lost the great man, however i had dealt with anything in the past was of no consequence whatsoever. Such was the inner trauma/shock, i had to find something deep within me to survive.

When i shared here in the first of those very long and very dark days, it was like people were talking yet it was like i was under water. In that i knew people were talking yet i could not decipher any words. Slowly i listened to what others gave back to me here and i realised that deep inside me i had an "inner strength". I am now completely aware of my inner strength and i am grateful for it each day. It is why i can manage the empty spaces the great man has left behind. My inner strength is why i can write this letter to you sober today.

With my sobriety, whatever is thrown at me in life, i WILL find a pathway forward. With drink on board i will have no chance, not a single glimmer of hope. With my sobriety i can bring my problems, my hurt and my pain to my family here and together we will find the right forward for me. It is the same for any of us.

My heart and my thoughts are with you today.

Be peaceful, be healthy and be strong. Loveness to you my dear, dear R Lee
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Unread 03-07-2016, 07:33 PM   #67
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Good evening my dear R Lee. Bright blessings to you.

You are deep in my thoughts.

I can only reach.....this much. Touch me R Lee. Let me know you are ok.

All my love my dear R Lee.
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Unread 03-07-2016, 09:23 PM   #68
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Hello R Lee, Gee, sorry for the pain you are going through right now. I tell you, sometimes life just sucks! But it sounds like you have a handle on it and since I know the strength that you have you will come through ok. Lean on your friends there and you know this family is with you always! Hugs!

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Unread 03-07-2016, 09:57 PM   #69
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Thinking of you, take care.
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Unread 03-08-2016, 12:20 PM   #70
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How you doing R Lee ? xx
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Unread 03-08-2016, 02:29 PM   #71
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Thinking of you, R.Lee!
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Unread 03-09-2016, 12:59 PM   #72
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Hi R Lee!

I am praying for you. I have been divorced for 14 years. I have had a couple of long term relationships since that time but nothing worked out. I have not dated in at least a couple of years, my focus is on sobriety, my boys, and my faith in Christ. If the Lord puts someone in my life - great. If not, I know that I will be ok.

Changes in our lives sometimes just suck. You sound like you have a good, strong plan to make it through, 24 hours at a time. You have been here SO MUCH for us, it is completely ok to fall apart to us if you need to. We are all human, and as I have proven in the past year, drinking solves absolutely nothing.

We love you - I think you know that. Spring is around the corner, so that helps my mood a little too. I will continue to pray for you!! Love, Jenm
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Unread 03-10-2016, 12:51 AM   #73
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Hi Rlee...

Sorry to hear about what happened. I am sure you are very strong and I believe you will continue to live the new way which will be new normal. Plan just for one day and live one day at a time. Things will get better and will fall in place. Things happen for a reason and will lead to something else better, that is waiting.

I hope the best for you...sorry i haven't been on the site for a long time...just catching up.

Have a great night...
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Unread 03-10-2016, 10:13 AM   #74
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That is OK iamtrying. Yes 1 day at a time. I am doing well. Thanks for you support.
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Unread 03-11-2016, 07:17 PM   #75
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RLee, I am learning to be alone. In a way it is helping me take a look at who I am and who I want to be. I think it hurts because it was not by our choice. Do you have a good support network when you want to be around people? Hang in there. I hope you know you are among friends.

Love, Susie
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Unread 03-12-2016, 10:46 AM   #76
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Yes Susie I am a friend of Bill & I go to many meetings a week.

You mentioned to someone else that sometimes you feel the urge for a buzz to get through the evening. If I was to drink I would ruin the evening for myself & everyone near me.

Thanks
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Unread 03-12-2016, 12:31 PM   #77
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Glad to know you are doing Ok...we all look up to you for support. I am sure you are taking this one day at a time. I am sure the drink will not cross your mind...if it does you know better than any of us what to do....but keep it out of your mind...have a good day Rlee....
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Unread 03-12-2016, 04:29 PM   #78
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Good evening my dear R Lee. Bright blessings to you.

My goodness yes. Who would have believed that Bill and his dear friend sat through a whole night, all those decades ago without that drink. Talk about a light bulb moment eh? I wonder if they ever thought their light bulb moment would have gone on to save continent amounts of people?

Frankly i am selfish. At this time i only care they have reached and touched you. The depth of my feelings for you, even as dramatic as Tryn can be, i have no description for.

Do you remember on my 50th birthday i dropped to my knee and prayed for the great man? I am doing the same for you.

Be peaceful, be healthy and be strong. Loveness to you my dear R Lee.
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Unread 03-14-2016, 09:38 AM   #79
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R Lee, how are you feeling today? Thinking of you x
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Unread 03-14-2016, 10:52 AM   #80
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Alexis, Thanks for asking. I am doing well.
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Unread 03-15-2016, 11:39 AM   #81
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Quote:
Originally Posted by R. Lee View Post
Alexis, Thanks for asking. I am doing well.
Good always thinking of you x
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Unread 03-15-2016, 02:41 PM   #82
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Glad to see you say you're doing well, R.Lee.
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Unread 03-15-2016, 02:54 PM   #83
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Good evening my dear R Lee. Bright blessings to you.

To be honest i do not think you are a fellow that would not tell us if your leg fell off to be fair, yet as someone who loves you like no other, one has to keep "plugging away".

I do hope you are "doing well". I wish i could be with you at this time.

Oh....hold on....i am.

Be peaceful, be healthy and be strong. Loveness to you my dear R Lee.
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Unread 03-16-2016, 10:42 AM   #84
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I'm glad you are dong well R.Lee, you deserve the best of a good life for yourself.
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Unread 03-16-2016, 11:15 AM   #85
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Good afternoon my dear R Lee. Bright blessings to you.

Here, on quite the most splendid of dear ole Blightys Spring days, you are firmly in my thoughts.

What are you doing today? Do you own the motorbike that you did a 100 miles on? If you do, "pop yer coat on and go for a ride".

Be peaceful, be healthy and be strong. Loveness to you my dear R Lee
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Unread 03-16-2016, 11:31 AM   #86
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Hi Tryn. Me & the credit union own a 2013 Honda Goldwing trike. Raining here today.
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Unread 03-16-2016, 02:30 PM   #87
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That might just complete the picture. I have a picture in my head of you, R.Lee, and now I've added the Goldwing. Perfect.

I have a scooter, but it only has two wheels and I feel my impending mortality every time I start it up, so I haven't ridden it in a long time and will probably donate it to charity. If it had three like your Goldwing, I'd ride it 100 miles too!

Have a good day, R.Lee.
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Unread 03-17-2016, 10:13 AM   #88
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That is a sight Biker Millie. Have a great day.
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Unread 03-17-2016, 01:13 PM   #89
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Good afternoon my dear R Lee. Bright blessings to you.

Oh gosh...a "Goldwing". Has it got a "dentist chair built in?" If i ever in my lifetime accept i am ready to have a driving licence again, AND i have the credit union on my side, i would "lurve" a Goldwing. Ah ha!....there is a standard prerequisite....yer feet have got to touch da floor! That unfortunately rules Tryn out.

Heres the thing...."well no problem Tryn. Just jump on the back, relax and enjoy".

Somebody has to give me a leg up to get on the back?>!

My dear R Lee i remember "Chips". It was an American cop show on UK TV with a couple of "cop dudes" on their bikes.

WOW.....I thought, "when i grow up....that's what i wanna be!"

I'm waiting, still. I could bring a box along to stand on?

You are in my thoughts every day at this time for you. A very special man having a difficult time.

Ohhh....go on....give me a ride?

Be peaceful, be healthy and be strong. Loveness to you my dear R Lee
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Unread 03-18-2016, 12:20 AM   #90
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Oh, dear, RLee. I am afraid I am a chicken when it comes to anything with less than 4 wheels or 4 legs! My mother rode my brother-in-law's Arabian when she was 75.......at a full gallop!

I will be happy when I can walk the dogs again!

Ride with the wind and know that our thoughts are with you.

Love, Susie
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Unread 03-20-2016, 12:45 PM   #91
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I used to have a boyfriend with a motorcycle, it was so fun, but one time I almost slipped and it scared me. R. Lee have a great Day! take care.
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Unread 03-21-2016, 11:21 AM   #92
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You too LD.
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Unread 03-21-2016, 02:47 PM   #93
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Hi R.Lee. Just thinking of you and hope you're doing okay.
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Unread 03-22-2016, 09:57 PM   #94
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R Lee,
I just stopped by to say hello and let you know I am thinking of you. Be well my friend. I love you sir.

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Unread 03-23-2016, 08:58 AM   #95
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Thank you Saint. Thinking of you too.
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Unread 03-23-2016, 08:13 PM   #96
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How are you R Lee? x
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Unread 03-24-2016, 10:16 AM   #97
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I am good Thank you Alexis. You have a great day too.
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Unread 03-26-2016, 01:10 AM   #98
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RLee, I miss Monty terribly, but I don't feel lonely. How about you?

Love, Susie
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Unread 03-26-2016, 02:33 AM   #99
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Lee you do know we love and care for you. That's why we inquire... Glad you're doing well.

It's never over until it's over.


Peace,
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Unread 03-26-2016, 11:13 AM   #100
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Good afternoon my dear R Lee. Bright blessings to you.

I have so many things i want to say to you. So many things i want to ask and share with you.

I know i do, because i do not think any of us would ever really know how you were doing/feeling.

I want to. Sometimes i get frustrated that i do not know how you are. I get frustrated i can not share with you what you share with me, sometimes i get frustrated i can not hug you. I can not touch you.

I am aware of what has happened to you recently. Trust me. You are sober today, and i am because you taught what thinking through the first drink meant.

You know as i write to you it is 2pm in dear ole Blighty. Behind me the telly is on. It is Saturday so there is the archetypal...."American war movie on". Yup. It is quite the most laughable propaganda from the 50's/60's's et al, each time i see them i think.........you know what?.....my dear R Lee was a "kid" then. He didn't have a clue.

Tell me i'm wrong?.....(Jeezzeee...i think my dearest Susie is Calamity Jane!....Whip crack away and all that?")......

I just want you to feel the love from the family you, and others have made. I want it to really, really mean something to you after all.

You "make us"....you have rebuilt us, a day at a time.

My dearest brother Saint is quite, quite right. "It's never over until it is over"......so true......i just want to pop something on the end of that....

And YOU know it.

The so many things i want to say to you....ummm....oh yes.......darn it, how does thank you and i love you do?

Be peaceful, be healthy and be strong. Loveness to you my dear R Lee.
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