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Unread 06-03-2010, 12:31 PM   #1
Dopeless Hope Fiend
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Lightbulb Reuniting with your kids...how did you do it?

Reuniting with your kids...how did you do it?

Hey anybody who's reading this...I'm looking for advice, experiences, anything that anybody wants to share about reuniting with kids.

Doesn't matter if you're the addict parent separated from your kid, clean parent with kid, a kid (or adult) of an addict parent you are (or were) separated from, friend or relative of an addict who successfully (or not) reunited with their child after any length of separation due to any addiction problem...anything that you know about reunification, please share.

Gratefully,

-DHF
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Unread 06-06-2010, 05:42 AM   #2
NancyB
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Hi DHF, I copied this thread to the bupe main forum to see if we could some responses.

http://www.addictionsurvivors.org/vb...ad.php?t=24527


Nancy
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Unread 12-29-2010, 11:02 PM   #3
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I see this posted awhile ago but I feel a need to reply. I really think that being emotionally ready is a big part of reuniting. I can only share my experience and hope it will help. I have been out of my girls lives for almost 5 years. I am now sharing a house with my oldest who is 20 and the emotions are probably the hardest part. I am careful to not press her to be as I would like her to be in relation to me. Time and alot of love is what I need to give her. I have a hard time with this and want to just hug her and have this great reunion but reality says differently. She has been damaged by my addiction and so I can only let her go at her own speed. We have a very long way to go and her anger is justified. She is untrusting, angry and I dont blame her. I think its important to really have someone work with the family that can help make things clearer for everyone whether it be a therapistetc. I dont know much but maybe that helps a bit. Dont give up
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Unread 01-07-2011, 11:25 PM   #4
Dopeless Hope Fiend
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Oh wow! Thank you for responding to my old post and sharing your experience...that's exactly what I was looking for; just other people's experiences. I was well-aware that no one could tell me precisely what to expect.

The reunion that I was preparing for took place back in June and was such a big success, I was allowed to bring my son home with me...out of state. His dad also let me take him traveling with my other kids. We were all over the place!

I drove like 5,000 miles this summer...something like that. Least it felt like it!

We got together again for Christmas. He just flew back home on the 2nd. Another fantastic visit! Perhaps I'm extremely lucky, or maybe my kids just weren't that damaged by my addiction...or maybe it will all blow up in the future.

My oldest child knows it all. I've been open and honest with her. My youngest two, I don't think either of them are old enough for hearing about "mommy's past." In due time...

But today...it's all good! Thanks so much for taking the time to share your experience with me!

-DHF
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