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Unread 12-22-2014, 10:37 AM   #93
gmasusie
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Lostdog,

We went to an enormous holiday party, full of booze and people I had not seen in perhaps 5 years. I had a real panic attack, locked myself in the bathroom for a while, and felt totally intimidated. When I got home and analyzed my behavior, I realized that for 90 days sobriety, that was a real test. Because I was not my old party self, people were polite, and then moved on. I came home, starting to feel rejected, and then realized, these were not people that I cared to connect with anyway. Besides, surviving that party without drinking was a real boost to my confidence. I do not choose to test myself in that way. I am grateful that I was not even tempted to drink.

As far as congruence is concerned, I don't believe you have to tell everyone exactly what you think, especially of them, at all times to maintain integrity. Share with us or someone you trust. Total honesty is not always necessary or prudent or kind to others. Honesty with ourselves is what builds that congruence and shows in how we treat others, I believe.

Lostdog, congratulations in your pursuit of sobriety and serenity. Sharing with us helps all of us as well as you.

Merry Christmas to all of this caring family!

Love, Susie
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