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Unread 03-23-2017, 06:44 PM   #196
soapdish
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Hi, thanks so much Alexis. Really means a lot to me when you guys ask after me.
My day has been lovely. I went to the market and it was raining, but it was light spring rain and I enjoyed getting wet.
I am so pleased about the rescheduling. I had time to do lots of things. I even made a veggie quiche! Burnt it, that's true, but I made an effort nonetheless. It is very crispy indeed!
At the moment I'm eating strawberries. They're huge and amazing!

There's this guy I've started paying to clean. I feel a bit weird having a cleaner but on the other hand I got free time today and that was great. He's a rose seller I see on my way home and I always say hi and in winter I took him hot tea and pies and we've chatted a few times. He's told me about his life here and in his home country. Anyway, on Valentine's day he said he hadn't sold a single rose. He's really desperate and he kept asking me if I knew of any work. I've redone a CV for him to hand out but there isn't any work and his Italian is really bad. In the end I said he could do a couple of hours a week at mine like a handyman/cleaner. So it's like a reciprocal helping hand but he seemed disappointed when I said just a couple of hours a week. Today he told me that he's going to lose his residency because there's too many of them in the apartment where he lives. I have a feeling he's gonna ask me if he can do his residency here but I've decided no. 'm worried about him though. He looks dirty and malnourished.
I'm not sure if I've done a stupid thing again. I had told myself not to be so soft and openhearted, as that's partly why I keep getting into trouble. I had promised myself to be more cautious and less trusting. Put my guard up. However, I don't want to completely change who I am. I would like to help him as much as I can, which isn't very much at the moment because my plate is kinda full. Yet, I have a doubt. Should I help him more? Should I have shrugged him off and stayed out of any potential trouble. I don't know. I really doubt all my decisions. I often act on a whim. I really don't trust myself at all.

But still, the afternoon was lovely and the lessons were all fantastic today.

Tomorrow I've got a naughty boy group, last lesson Friday ugh. So I have to go into it super energised and smiley or they'll grind me down.
All in all, I think it's good for me to be working and I'm feeling more focused now than I did a month ago, and these strawberries are truly delicious

Sweet kisses to you all
xxxxxxxxxxxx
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