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Unread 02-28-2017, 06:19 PM   #154
soapdish
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Posts: 371
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Hi,

Sorry, been so busy. There's glue and confetti everywhere. and pancakes. A lot of pancakes!
Yeah so today is Fat Tuesday, Shrove tuesday, Mardi Gras, Carnaval and in Italy the period before Lent is called Carnival. For a few weeks there are celebrations in different towns and cities. The Venice carnival with their masked balls is most famous but also in Viareggio there are parades and huge papier mache mask heads. In my town they dress up, get drunk and have a parade but it was very disappointing this year. Everyone I saw today was wearing a onesy.
I prefer the homemade costumes.

My dad's out of hospital and I'm going back to England on Friday. I haven't organised anything. I've left everything last minute so I'm a bit annoyed with myself for being such a procrastinator. Again.

As for the letter, I would like to reply but I actually have nothing to say. I don't know what to say. What can I say? I've thought about it so much that I'm exhausted. I can't even be bothered sitting down and writing him a reply. So maybe I should just ask the postman not to bring them.

I'm thinking that now might be a good a time to return to England. With this happening to my dad and I would be safe away from him forever. If in 2 years he comes out not a better person, but full of wrath at me ignoring his letters, he won't find me here. I could start a new life in England, near my parents. But I'm so afraid of a major change right now. I can barely plan the next week.
Anyway I can't just up and leave. It will take time to prepare everything anyway. So I will just start preparing and let future me take a decision!

On the other hand, I might send him a simple letter saying not to apologize anymore. I forgive him but he is ill and I can't help him. I can't save him. He can only save himself. He should get counselling and use his time in prison to better himself. Do lots of courses, learn a trade, a language, go to the library, read. Stay away from negative people and situations.

What do you think?
Choices and decisions again. I'm so bad at taking decisions. I will decide by Thursday at midday!

Lots of love
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
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