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Unread 08-29-2014, 10:37 AM   #7
Sestra
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Originally Posted by Saved by sub View Post
I could have written your post. My life is so much likes yours that it's scary. My sister is 2 years older than me. Like you, we were super close because she filled the role of mother and sister for me. I would not have survived my childhood without her. She protected me, took beatings for me etc. I've never lived more than 10 min from her. We were pregnant at the same time and gave birth a month apart. At age 30 she started to drink as a way to cope with a break up and she never stopped. We started to grow apart because of it. She used her kids to manipulate me to get money from me. I tried everything I could to get her help. She died October 6, 2011 from liver failure. She was only 38. She literally drank herself to death and it only took 8 years. She was sober for 5 months when she died. Just one month short of being eligible to be put on the liver transplant list. I am so thankful to spend those 5 sober months by her side and so grateful that I got to be by her side as she took her last breath. I miss her so much!!! I totally understand where you are coming from and feel your pain. If you need to talk, I'm here.
Thank you so much for your response. I was beginning to think no one else would read it. But....my god, I'm so sorry about your sister. That's one of the most tragic things I've ever heard, & it broke my heart. I'm so afraid that I may also lose my sister in some way like that. She's only 30 this year. I recently saw my dad & we actually had a nice visit. My grandma (his mom) died a couple of months ago, & I think he's trying to make up for the time he missed with me, which is surprising. He's doing really well. However, I think he knew that I didn't want to talk about my sister. But he only briefly said that "She's doing really well.." But I never know what to believe. She's deceived everyone so many times, she's one of the most gifted liars I've ever known. I saw a photo of her in his guest bedroom. (Sigh) She still looks so dangerously underweight, with a greyish hue to her skin. I was hoping after the baby she'd get some weight on her, & somehow become healthier, maybe. But those f-ing pills...Probably like you, I love her so damn much, but I don't see how I could ever trust her again. I just don't see how.

Anyway, I wanted to tell you as well, that I'd be more than happy to lend you an ear too. Anyone that can relate to my situation, we can discuss or talk about anything that's still hurts us inside. My heart goes out to you, & I wanted to give you my most humble thanks, & I really hope that you're ok.
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