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Unread 12-02-2014, 09:33 AM   #13
jenm
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I'm sorry to say that my brother has not changed as far as his drinking is concerned - in fact, I would say that it is even worse. His drinking has always increased around the holidays. I just pray that he doesn't get another drunk driving charge or even worse. It is SO HARD to watch someone that you love kill himself with alcohol. Especially when I know for a fact that there is a way out!

He was supposed to pick up my son and I for Thanksgiving dinner at my grandma's. After he was an hour late, I called and I can always tell when he has been drinking. He really can fool everyone else because it is so common to him to be intoxicated that it is almost like normal. I just asked him to tell me the truth. He got mad and directed very hurtful statements toward me. Long story short, he went to Thanksgiving with my mom and my grandma. I could not participate. I could also not explain it to my 6 year old son who was crying and screaming because he wanted to go to Thanksgiving dinner at GG's. I knew it would be a disaster, I cannot "pretend" that all is well when my brother is once again drunk at one of our family gatherings.

He followed up with some very evil and hurtful words to me on Saturday. Apparently I "ruined" his relationship with his girlfriend because of my influence and that I talk to her about his drinking. I also "ruined" Thanksgiving. He sent me a really long email detailing all of the things that I have done 'wrong' since about 1998. I didn't even read it, I deleted it. He told me that I'm a hypocrite and chastised my church and my Christian friends.

You know what? I do not claim to be perfect, the only one who ever lived a perfect life was Jesus Christ. By HIS saving grace, today I can humble myself and ask forgiveness when I have wronged. I know I have made mistakes. I still make mistakes. But I stay in the word of God and know that by my choice to open my heart to Jesus as my Lord and Savior, I have been forgiven.

After many months of not speaking, I had what one would call a "surface" relationship with him, at least we talked some. I'm grateful that he came (an hour late) to my little son's birthday party at a restaurant, although he smelled as if he had been drinking. Unfortunately, now I just cannot participate in his continued alcoholic destruction and hurtfulness and it is so sad to me to watch the enablers in his life. It just breaks my heart.

I am thankful for the health and happiness of my 3 boys. I am so grateful and so blessed. They don't know their uncle very well even though we've always lived in the same city. Over the years, he has always been too busy or self absorbed to ever want to really get to know them. Or mostly drinking. Please continue to keep my family in your prayers, if you don't mind. I cannot make him sober, but I can pray that the Lord will work a miracle in his heart. Take care, thanks for 'listening'! Jenm
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