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Unread 07-17-2013, 03:51 PM   #40
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Posts: 23

Originally Posted by theswan View Post
To start a little background:

I am 60 and got sober in AA in 1987. I belonged to as tough as group as one can find. They were also the most loving, caring group of people I ever met. We had a lot of "Big book thumpers" and I was one for a time. This is a natural phase for some who feel they have been saved by AA and not altogether a bad thing. One will usually grow out of it. As far as NA, well I went to many meetings because I worked with youth at risk who had addictions and took them to the NA meetings. I'd indentify as "I'm Glen and I'm powerles" in respect to their no alcohol posture.
The meetings were decent but I just liked AA better. I went up and down the ladder of service being at the top a coffee maker then GSR, DCM and then Area special needs chairperson. I read and re read the traditions and did not even see a clause that excluded anyone unless they had no desire to stop drinking. I have been active for many years and now have slowed down a lot. I went to a meeting two months ago and will go now and again mostly to see friends and hopefully help a new comer.

My life was turned upside down by chronic pain from a birth disability and an auto accident, surgery and football injuries. I have been on most every narcotic and feel a great debt to suboxone. I take it now for pain but have "proved" it is not a horror drug one can never get off of. I decided to get to a "set point" with my pain and see if I could control it without bupe or any opioid. So I tapered, had little WD to speak of and stayed off for a year before returning to bupe for pain.

So what do I think about NA and their policy? Well it kinda sucks but they have a right to be as they want to be. I feel however as a fellowship that they break the tradition of the only requirement. A group as they traditions suggest can bend and even break traditions except for I believe, affilation. However, the entire fellowship not allowing a person to share because of a drug, well it smacks me as wrong but they have the right to be wrong except as said in affiliation.

I have also said what is wrong with keeping this to ones self? Do we really need to spout out our medical history? My hunch is sharing a subject we know will be met with controversy, is purposely stirring the pot! I mean to what end do we share? Do we really say, "by the way, I take suboxone" to be of use? or are we just trying to bend others to our way of seeing things?

Here is my deepest feeling on a person using sub as a tool or even as a "crutch".......So freaking what???!! Who really cares? I came in to recovery living in a 12X8 foot room sharing a bathroom with several others, with a broken nose, with a black eye and with my hopes of ever having a normal life near zero! I was either drinking or planning a drink or getting the drugs to allow me to function after a bender. The thought of drinking was almost always in my head. I was just starting to hear voices, had not had a girlfriend for 7 years and had severe anxiety that was even happening as I drank (then what does one do?) I can in AA and recovery a shell of a person and what about now?

Today I have a beautiful life, a wife that loves me deeply, I have my family and I ahve decent health. I no longer get beat up nor do I beat people up. I own a lot of "stuff" and this is good but most of all, I have my dignity, my God and have discovered (as gravy on top of it all) That I have a decent voice and I sue it as a cantor and in the choir of my beloved Church.

Oh, yeah and my pain is well controlled by bupe. So what? I kinda think I have earned through my horror story and recovery story to have a say in a twelve step group. If they do not, well who's loss is it?

Keep it between you and your doctor unless you feel you'd pick up a drug/drink then tell your sponsor or better yet find a sponsor who is sober and will not judge

Hi Glen - I couldn't agree more and I think its so wonderful that you have found peace and happiness. I've never attended AA/NA, but I agree that's its very wrong to tell someone that they are diseased for life and incurable. There are many paths to healing and people should never judge what may work for others.
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