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Unread 06-21-2013, 10:41 PM   #12
R. Lee
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Posts: 4,984
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Backwaterdogs, From the sounds of it you lived a responsible life unlike your brother or your father. You had the right to make the decision to keep your distance when your brother behaved like he did. As I suggest to other relatives of active alcoholics "you don't have to live like this"

My life was all about me, me & more me. I was a crappy husband, fatherson, brother & friend. If I did something for someone else I expected something in return. I was a drunk for 42 years. I roared through peoples lives.

In the support group that I use in recovering from alcoholism we learn that we can carry the message but not the alcoholic.

You wife hit the nail on the head. She read your brother right. So did your mother.

I thought your dad would show up drunk. I'm so glad that he did not. Maybe your brother's passing will open his eyes.

You are beating yourself up for something you had no control over. You were a good brother & that is why your heart aches & you feel guilt that you did not do enough.

Let him go by loving him & knowing he is at rest.
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