Thread: Benzo's and Sub
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Unread 12-04-2010, 04:03 PM   #15
AbbyNormal
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Tom S

It really is just my addiction that drives my behavior. My anxiety needs to be dealt with w/o any drugs. I do know how sick my thinking is, as I'm a recovering alcoholic who sobered up in 1987 and hasn't had a drink since. AA was my means to that end so I have been involved in recovery for many years. In truth, I stopped going to meetings many years ago but still remember how I was able to function just fine with no drugs at all in me.

So I apologize if my rants seem a bit disjointed. I'm beating myself up over relapsing and my lousy addictive thinking has been sabotaging my recovery from opiates. I do know what it takes. It takes just NOT ingesting any drug other than my doctor approve dose of Sub. No Xanax, no extra Sub because I feel anxious. I just need the time under my belt and my thinking will follow later. You know the saying, "bring the body and the mind will follow". That's what's needed for my recovery.

TLG

Yes, I plan on doing exactly what you suggested. Yoga, meditation, etc. I just tend to procrastinate, that's all. Typical addict behavior. I have to remind myself how far I've come since induction. No more high quantities of Norco, Soma, & Tramodal. (with the occasional Xanax) My wife is so much happier that I'm back. No more nodding off to TV at night, or embarrassing her in front of friends. I also got rid of a nicotine gum habit. That one actually caused me to go to Urgent Care, not knowing I was going through nicotine withdrawals! It was really bad.

So I have come a long way, and I have to start appreciating it.

Thanks All,

Tomas
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